


All Your Faithless Loyalties

by silasfinch



Category: Killing Eve (TV 2018)
Genre: F/F, Gen
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-11-14
Updated: 2021-01-28
Packaged: 2021-01-30 12:27:18
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 13
Words: 40,554
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21428206
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/silasfinch/pseuds/silasfinch
Summary: Eve Polastri is a lawyer a Martens Legal ServicesOksana  Astankova is her boss's step daughter and a test pilot for Vasiliev AviationEve bails her out of trouble and tests the limits of jurisdictionsOksana falls in lust or love? and launches a charm offensive29/01/21: Dance Magic (Oksana POV)
Relationships: Eve Polastri/Villanelle | Oksana Astankova
Comments: 47
Kudos: 350





	1. Testing Juristritions

**Author's Note:**

> Motivated by the premise that often people with sociopathic tendencies are drawn high adrenaline jobs like fighter pilots  
Also Oksana seems like the type who would like such power.  
Thanks to Rysler for catching my dyslexic mistakes - its a much better fic for it.

_'Cause when the mouths are far between_

_Something in your conscience screams_

_Lipstick on a guillotine_

_Darling caved in_

_Think of me, sweet baby_

_When your head is in the west_

_If you need me, I'll be out in the wind_

_I'm sure that you've seen better_

_For you I did my best_

_But as I go by, think of you my friend_

_When I know I can win_

_All Your Faithless Loyalties - Two Gallants _

An inappropriate woman is flirting with her. 

Flirting of any kind isn't something that Eve Polastri is necessarily against, especially after the wreckage of her marriage to Niko. However, most people at Martens Legal Services are intimately familiar with that disaster and view her with varying degrees of pity and scorn. Her last serious attempt at flirtatious banter was with her husband when they were both in graduate school. However, that doesn't mean she is blind to the practice. 

Her suiter is far from subtle in her efforts to gain her attention. Oksana Anatoljevna Astankova is a test pilot for her stepfather's aviation company. Oksana's stepfather is married to Eve's boss, which means their paths do cross infrequently. Of course, Oksana ensures that this happens more often than is statistically likely. 

There are random visits to Eve's office when Oksana barely visited her stepmother in the past. The young woman finds most things 'on the ground' boring. Strangely Eve doesn't bother to report these to HR or bother Carolyn. 

Somehow a selection of lunches from Eve's favourite restaurant appear on her desk without the knowledge of either her assistant or paralegal. Eve can't bring herself to complain when she gets the heady spices and meat every workday. Niko did all the cooking in their house. 

Eve doesn't have a long line of suitors, but it wouldn't be challenging to uncover Oksana's identity. Only a wealthy and eccentric woman would court her with such a broad range of accessories designed specifically to compliment her hair. 

"You keep worse hours than I did in flight school." 

Eve looks up from her briefing notes, and Oksana leans against the door. She is carrying a paper bag and a bottle of wine. The woman has a strange ability to sneak up without warning. Eve gestures vaguely to the seat at her desk. 

"I am sorry if my work hours are interfering with your stalking version of courtship and attention-seeking." 

"Oh, not at all."

Oksana is a surprisingly engaging company and is knowledgeable about the legal profession. She enjoys regaling Eve with tales of flying and testing the latest flight technology. Konstantin builds some of the fastest jets in the world and Oksana (despite her age) is one of his top testers. Eve doesn't understand Oksana, but she does not doubt that the younger woman has a passion for her chosen profession. 

It's almost surprising that she has time to flirt and bed so many women. Eve settles in to enjoy the story; she no longer has to feel guilty about someone waiting at home. 

***

The whole thing started innocently enough. 

Carolyn Martens is many things, including ruthless, ambitious and willing to call in no small amount of favours. However, she does provide employees with a decent compensation package, including parties and regular retreats. The time off doesn't quite compensate for the 80 working week but it’s something. Eve needs some semblance of social life, Niko got the friends in the divorce. It's only fair because he was the one that did all the socialising and maintaining of said friendships. 

Eve meets Oksana at the company skiing retreat in the Swiss Alps. The younger woman is an excellent skier and offers to teach Eve the basics, which turns out to be a thinly disguised ruse to flirt with her. 

"You aren't shifting your weight correctly. Your hips aren't working together when you hit the angle."

"Not all of us are designed to defy gravity like you do," Eve grunts from her position on the snow. 

"Stop flailing like a giraffe on an acid trip. The goal is to keep at least one leg on the ground at all times." Oksana advises from her position at the bottom of the slope. 

"Don't you have a mountain to fly off or something, Top Gun?" Eve huffs as she brushes snow off. 

Oksana grins and skis up beside her, offering a gloved hand. She is thin and willowy but incredibly strong and pulls Eve up without effort and avoids tangling their poles. Eve feels a little ridiculous in this position, but Oksana's hands are steady despite the teasing. 

"I know a physical activity that you are better suited for, Eve."

"Oksana," Eve warns as she catches her breath.

"Come to the swimming pools with me and then warm yourself up with a gallon of the best hot chocolate in the country. Anna made me import the stuff."

***

Eve only has the vaguest notion of who Carolyn's husband is but Konstantin Vasiliev owns one of the biggest private aviation companies. He isn't as well-known as Virgin or Telsa, but that is mainly because the man prefers to keep a lower profile and work on less public projects. Oksana is his stepdaughter from his second marriage. He remained loyal to his adopted child even if his marriages didn't work out after the death of his first wife. The union between the top legal mind and the wild inventor is unusual, but it seems to work for them. 

"Are you ok, Carolyn? We can postpone this meeting you aren't feeling well?" 

Eve hesitates to make the offer but time is money. Carolyn staring at her watch every few seconds isn't going to get these EU trade contracts reviewed. Martens Legal services are busier than ever now that Brexit is in the final stages--or at least theoretically. 

"Oksana is doing a risk test flight today. She is arrogant enough to think that nothing can happen and Konstantin has a perfect safety record. I barely understand the silence, but there are a new engine design and autopilot procedures. Every crash is running through my head no matter how remote. 

Eve feels oddly affected by the news and leans forward when Carolyn moves her laptop around. One the screen there is an internal feed showing an odd-looking plane on the runway. A man is commentating and offering a countdown. The long and short of it is that Oksana ‘Villanelle’ Astankova is seconds away from lift-off. 

Eve finds herself holding her breath until Oksana reaches the sky and does requisite loops and testing manoeuvres. Her breathless commentary comes through in both English and Russian. 

***

"I need you to handle a delicate matter for me." 

Eve suppresses a sigh and drops back onto her desk. For once she is within a shot of getting out of this place on time. Elena and Jess are waiting for her at the latest upmarket Mexican restaurant. These two are the only ones to stick with her throughout the separation. She owes it to them to make a token appearance. That particular dream is slipping away with every word Carolyn utters. 

"It appears Oksana took the celebrations of the successful test flights a little too far. I need you to get ahead of any legal ramifications; she can't afford any marks on her file," Carolyn explains quickly. 

"I have no experience in..." Eve begins but wilts under her gaze. 

"You don't need special skills to soothe ruffled feathers, Eve. The club owner is a business colleague of my husband. It's better if this stays in house. When Konstantin feeds you his great grandmother's stew, you become part of the family."

"Or a particularly useful minion who feels a strange degree of loyalty?" Eve quips. 

"Where do you think everyone starts in our game. Oksana likes you and is likely to follow any instructions you give with minimal fuss." 

"She is a magpie with something new and shiny to play with; my influence will wane soon enough."

"All the better to strike while the proverbial iron is hot. Don't wear those heels, we don't need Oksana swooning in her cell and not being able to form a sentence of defence."

"What the..."

"Get moving to beat the traffic, Eve." Eve doesn't understand Carolyn Martens that well, but her loyalty to the family is without question. She could stay here and argue, but the results will be the same in the end. 

***

Oksana isn't at fault in this situation. 

Eve suspects that she is guilty of many other crimes and wild and crazy antics but not in this particular case. Considering her starting point, her actions were almost disciplined. 

The party at the local scene got out of hand when several people mixed too many spirts. The insults and fistfights flew almost as fast as the planes. Adrenaline and the release of stress after a high-pressure situation makes for a dangerous combo. Oksana was trying to protect same-sex couples from homophobic jerks. 

The owner is both a businessman and a reasonable human. He knows that the aviation group provides many and frequent bookings. The check Eve offers covers costs and lost revenue. However, he can't stop the police from taking the people to the station to cool off and dry out. 

"Are you ok?" Eve asks. 

Oksana is sitting calmly in the back of the cell. She looks in far better condition than the man in the cells opposite. Her eyes are clear and bright. There is no trembling in her limbs, and her posture is habitually straight. 

"The British have a laughable idea about what both fighting and alcohol is, I wasn't in any danger. Those grunts and juniors could barely throw a punch. Thank you for rescuing me though, you look especially lovely tonight."

"Strictly speaking my presence here isn't voluntary and not worthy of gratitude."

“Lawyers always play with words, don’t you?”

***

"What are you doing tonight?"

Oksana is uncharacteristically silent as they walk away from the police station. She isn't entirely off the hook but Eve manages to negotiate a reasonable settlement for the property damage, one that won't affect her licence to fly planes and fighter jets. Not even Konstantin and his company are above the laws of safe aviation in the post 9/11 world. 

"Trying to find some halfway decent food and rewrite brief notes for your stepmother. Please try and stay out of trouble for the next 48 hours, Fly Girl, I don't have time to handle your chaos, and you can't afford my hourly rate." 

"Let me take you to dinner to say thank you?" 

Eve wants to say no and keep firm lines between them. At the same time, she is especially hungry and dreading reading the text from her friends. Her life seems to revolve around either work or putting out fires for Konstantin’s family. Whatever Oksana is, she is a distraction from everyday life. 

"If you can find a Noodle House for under 20 quid then I am in." 

"Pilots live on fast, hot carbohydrates. Follow me, Eve, and prepare to have your mind blown." 

"Fighting words to a woman with Asian heritage."

Eve resolutely refuses to consider this outing a date. She will still bill Carolyn for her time and itemise the expense on principle. However, she cannot help the thrill of anticipation as Oksana pulls her down a side street. 

***

"Your ex-husband is an idiot for leaving you." 

For some reason, those simple words affect Eve far more than the constant stream of flattery and sexual innuendo. Perhaps it’s because the younger woman is looking so earnest in the candlelight. As Oksana promises, the food is excellent and filling without being too much. The younger woman handles chopsticks in a way that even her judgemental grandmother would approve. 

"Believe me, that is not the popular opinion. I was a terrible wife with limited to no social skills outside obligatory law events. Niko forgave me all my failings except for not wanting children or to move closer to his parents in Poland." 

"Meh, let one of those desperate girls build his housewife fantasy. You are worth far more than that" Oksana says confidently. 

Eve doesn't respond immediately and instead focuses on her noodles and beef. She isn't sure why she brought up the topic of Niko, but it is refreshing to have somebody on her side for once. 

"Why do you have such an opinion? I am hardly the type to attract the attention of somebody who is a real-life character from Top Gun." 

"I don't know, you are more interesting than the last five people to hold your role. It takes a lot to interest me; most people are boring and don't come close to competing with an hour of flight time."

"I'd ask if such talk works in your everyday life, but I already know the answer to that. Carolyn had high hopes for that paralegal whose heart you stomped on in Norway." 

"Sarah got what she wanted--the prestige of claiming somebody with a call sign. Her heart is still whole, Carolyn loves to scold me." 

Eve can only admit this to herself, but she feels a surge of pride at being an object of Oksana's affection, whatever the consequences. The woman is simultaneously intimidating and inaccessible, and Eve adores a challenge. 

***

"Another one of your conquests, Oksana?" 

Eve struggles between amusement and disbelief as she watches Oksana decline an invitation from an older businesswoman who seems intent on ignoring Eve's existence entirely. Observing the interplay between the two is a fascinating experience and harkens back to her days doing psychology as an undergrad. 

"I am not ashamed of my sexual desires or finding someone to meet them, Eve," Oksana says sharply sounding like she is repeating a constant criticism. 

"There is no reason that you should be," Eve replies with a placating gesture. 

Oksana regards her steadily as she twirls the last of her noodles. The woman has an almost ridiculous level of grace and poise. Intellectually, Eve understands that fighter pilots had a level of fitness. However, seeing this in action takes matters to a whole new level. Oksana makes her feel clumsy and off-kilter. 

"You fascinate me, Eve."

"I am a middle-aged divorcee with a middling legal career. I am quite sure you have a whole black book full of more interesting people." Eve keeps her voice even. 

"Being old doesn't stop you from being fascinating Eve, grey hair is all the rage right now. You are an average lawyer because Carolyn needs you right where you are. The good little soldier who is ensuring that ryegrass and rhinestones can get across European borders." Oksana voice drips with scorn. 

"Hate to break it to you, but few lawyers have exciting war stories about fighting for justice and making grand speeches. The life of a fighter pilot is far more exciting," Eve disagrees with a half shrug. 

"The fact that you are a lawyer is not the reason I like you, Eve. Lawyers are boring, but you are interesting." 

Eve doesn't have a witty response to these compliments and comments. Oksana is so upfront in her object that Eve feels like a kid with something close to a crush. She doesn't want to give up this feeling for a more conventional and safe life. 

Her marriage is a testament to her failures at being normal. 

***

"Come home with me?"

Eve lost the solid ground defence of 'I'm Straight" or 'I'm married' a long time ago. The first point has never been true strictly speaking; she never felt the need to explore bisexuality beyond a few brief relationships in college. Relationships with whichever sex were never enough of a priority to risk upsetting her conservative relatives. The divorce papers that were making their way through the British legal system weaken the second point. 

"Yeah, that's not happening tonight, Oksana, this night or anything other night."

"We were having such a good time. There is no need for the night to end," Oksana negotiates earnestly but without much skill. 

"Our night ends here. To start, I am almost twice your age and work for your stepmother; my job means too much to me for the PR nightmare of being one of your conquests." Eve counters firmly. 

"Carolyn doesn't mind as long as I'm discreet. She loves Konstantin and therefore tolerates me, a night with me is worth breaking your moral code Eve." Oksana reasons.

"Spending hundreds of pounds on food and trinkets is far from discreet, Fly Girl, my paralegal is already gossiping with the secretary pool." 

Oksana looks anything but remorseful as they reach her sportscar and stand together, watching each other without breaking the tension. There is a faint bruise that marks the tall pilot’s pale cheek. Somehow her long hair is still in a regulation plait. However, there are questionable stains underneath her leather jacket. 

"If you didn't want my attention, Martens Legal Services has a comprehensive personal space policy, why are you wearing my gifts?" 

"That's a conversation for another day. You have a safety briefing with Konstantin in the morning. Go home and get some sleep; even young Mavericks need rest." 

Eve instinctively reaches for the necklace at her throat. She can't honestly say why she plays into Oksana's dynamic, but this strange flirtation is both intriguing and exciting. It feels like a sexy version of law school debates and problem-solving. 

"Stay safe in the on the next flight, Oksana. I don't have legal jurisdiction in the sky." 

Oksana freezes as Eve reaches to touch the younger woman's cheek, tracing the angry-looking bruise. The mark is starting to darken and swell. For somebody who insists on moving and talking every second Oksana can remain surprisingly still with the right motivation. 

"Thank you for ensuring my freedom, Eve," Oksana says sincerely. 

Eve stands on the footpath long after the other woman drives away. How a moderately successful lawyer who specialises in pan European trade finds herself in this position is a mystery. 


	2. Testing Eve

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to Rysler as always

Her call sign is Villanelle. 

Strictly speaking as a private test pilot with little combat experience, Oksana doesn't need or earn such a designation. However, Konstantin insists that his wild and competitive stepdaughter do everything by the book. In practice, this means Oksana went through basic Air Force training and earning her stripes with everyone else, complete with gruelling hours and testing. She endures considerable mockery for her age, status and every other characteristic known to man. Hence the call sign based on her favourite perfume. Oksana fumes at first but even her harshest critics can't deny her skill. 

Her stepfather took a risk investing so much time, energy and trust into somebody many teachers call 'unmanageable'. Even the Air Force only manages to hold her attention by defining everything as a challenge and a test of concentration. As soon as they let her fly, Oksana finds an escape from the endless boredom that threatens to swallow her whole. 

Her life can then divide into pre-flying life and life where she can expend energy conquering the skies. She doesn't like recalling the early years. Konstantin never misses a chance to test her skills or offer a new challenge. Oksana's paperwork and theoretical education are under more scrutiny than any of her peers. 

Hence Oksana spending the day with her stepfather getting grilled on the latest schematics, emergency procedures and engineering. The exercises are monotonous and dull but easy enough to work through. 

"I have never seen you like this" Konstantin huffs angrily. 

"My score was 89%" Oksana snaps back. 

"I am sure 11% will matter when you are crashing and alive, Sana!"

"You are making this deliberately harder than any conceivable scenario. I'm surprised there are no alien ships for me to dodge or a few Death Stars!"

Konstantin collapses into the chair in frustration, squeezing his stress ball waiting to calm down before things get out of hand. Their fights are legendary and often involve flying objects. 

"Who is she? The last time you were like this, there is a woman involved, not your usual flings." 

Oksana glowers before reaching over the desk for her gloves. Her lack of an answer is revealing for the man who has known her all her life. There is a stiff set to the shoulders and rigidity to the jaw. He has struck a nerve but doesn't want to cause another communication blackout this close to Christmas. 

"Let's rerun the test, I promise not to include any aliens."

Oksana offers a slight smile before following her stepfather down the hall. 

***

Eve Polastri is a fascinating contradiction. 

As a rule, Oksana doesn't analyze her attraction to a woman. In her opinion, people waste far too much time having an existential crisis about who they find attractive and what it means for the future. Woman are beautiful and intriguing, and no mystery needs solving. In flying there is a formula for producing the perfect flight, concentration, calculation and coordination. Similar principles apply to interaction with a female companion, the charm, the elegance, the situation. Oksana can go through the motions without expending too much energy in between flight duties. 

Eve makes her want to devote all her time and energy to a single purpose. 

When she and Kenny were at each other’s throat, he spends hours coming up with insults that were far from inventive. Some were on the mark, Oksana is always looking for people to spark her interest no matter how good or bad their intentions. She needs something to keep her nerves humming and reacting when she is on the ground. 

On the surface, Eve Polastri is as exciting as the plywood planes she used to get for successive birthdays. The woman does have any hobbies, tattoos or kinks to the best of the office gossips’ knowledge. 

During that ski trip for the Martens workers, Oksana sees a different side of the woman. Eve is hopeless at asking or anything that requires coordination. However, she is willing to spar verbally with Oksana at the first opportunity. Most people find her intimating, either from a professional or personal point. 

_"You are too tall and gangly for a true Tom Cruise impersonation, not that you'll want to have such life goals and too cynical for Carol Danvers. Were those aviator shades necessary?"_

Eve doesn't want to hear all the 'glamourous' stories about being a pilot and all the tricks and techniques of flying combat and reconnaissance machines. She doesn't beg Oksana for a tour of 'the base' or feigns some knowledge in the field. Her questions are thoroughly mundane and practical about the legal ramifications of private vs. government aviation contracting. 

Oksana doesn't succeed in seducing the older woman than but that doesn't mean she isn't willing to keep trying. 

***

"Tell me about Eve Polastri."

Oksana aims to strike the mark between playful and inviting banter. This technique is always tricky with her stepmother, who debates and analyzes human behaviour for a living. The older woman might not actively practice law anymore, but she still presents a formidable intellect. Oksana and Kenny are her ideal situations for plans and schemes. In vastly different ways, both she and her stepbrother are proving disappointments to her. 

"You are long past thing age where I can tell you what to do with any success, but please turn your attention elsewhere." 

Oksana spent many of her formative years consciously ignoring this woman and her possible role in their lives. Konstantin is the only constant in her life, and the intrusion felt unnatural. Things are at a standoff now that the younger woman spends most of her time at work or flying for pleasure. 

"Eve is made of sterner stuff than your last paralegal who wilted at the first sign of experimentation," Oksana argues with a shrug. 

"Do not cross me on this one, Sana. Eve has the potential to make a senior position at the firm, a dalliance with you could jeopardise future prospects."

"Consider me warned, Jane Austen," Oksana replies dutifully. 

"Warned off?" Carolyn asks without much hope of a definite answer.

Oksana offers a characteristically enigmatic smile before moving to circulate in the family party. Carolyn watches her go, the prospect of another relationship entanglement at the office is a frightening one. Eve Polastri is no weak damsel and may enjoy the attention, which is even more complicated. 

***

Eve is a natural lawyer.

Oksana spends more time plotting to break laws (under the radar of course) than admiring the people who enforce codes of justice. However, even she can tell that the object of her affection has a passion and drive for the profession. There a few things more annoying than negotiating trade and contract law for the European powers in and out of Brussels but Eve manages to bring the topic alive. Oksana finds she doesn't need Carolyn to discover information about Eve; she needs to watch and bribe her stepbrother for access.

"Carolyn is a frugal crone, but even she appreciates the digital age, doesn't she? Why aren't you searching through files electronically?" 

Oksana finds Eve in the law library of Martens Legal Services. This term is a grand name for an unimpressive space. A long rectangle room has the floor to ceiling legal texts with work tables for people to review the documents in question. Naturally, the lamps are from their many trips back to Russia. 

"It's a generational thing. I did the majority of my academic career without the benefit of ultrafast broadband and comprehensive digitization. I reach my limit when it comes to staring at screens all day, sorry to disappoint," Eve says wearily. 

Oksana comes to stand behind Eve and starts to massage her shoulders. Her long fingers are firm and seem to be aiming for specific points. The sensation isn't sexual or even pleasant, but it is useful.

"Military-grade flight tests and endurance measures push the body to the point of near collapse. I am no stranger to headaches and light sensitivity."

***

Eve likes to play games. 

Oksana is impulsive and driven by her ego and libido more often than not. However, she isn't stupid or without common sense. If her advances towards Eve were truly futile, she wouldn't pursue the matter. One of Oksana's skills in life is reading women and their responsiveness to her advances. No woman is worth the lectures and chaos from the family if she misplays her hand. 

Eve enjoys putting Oksana little gives on display like some sort of bird testing the worthiness of a mate's offerings. She doesn't put them on show too prominently. The state of her post-divorce finances means that people would begin to notice such an upgrade in accessories. 

However, if Oksana looks hard enough, she can see them and admire the beauty. Her selections compliment both Eve's natural preferences and best features. This woman spends far too much time ignoring her physical appearance in favour of the typical lawyer look. Carolyn's dress code serviceable but bland. 

"Do lawyers who work with the prices of grain and wheat or border patrol get to go to fancy galas and events?" Oksana asks casually. 

She is watching Eve hop around her office trying to find the matching high heel. Her dress is stunning, a vivid blue against her black hair and darker features. The new earrings hang just right against the outfit. Oksana feels a swell of disappointment that she won't be escorting Eve that night. However, Eve's 'date' is Bill Pargrave, a wrinkled man with an infant. Oksana's doesn't think he is a genuine competition as he shows off the kid at every opportunity. 

"Occasionally they let us out to party with cheap champagne and long speeches. Sorry to interrupt our takeaway night. Carolyn needs a cover last minute."

"Then, I will direct my anger towards her?" Oksana promises gravely. 

Eve smiles as Oksana moves towards her, holding up a small bottle of perfume and dabbing it against her neck, taking the opportunity to push several locks of hair out of the way. This fragrance isn't Oksana's favourite, but it will compliment Eve's outfit and the occasion. 

"There you go." 

"Don't take me in any Instagram photos with weird filters."

"A photographic memory is a useful thing."

***

Eve needs a challenge in her life. 

Oksana couldn't care less about the intricacies of Eve's chosen profession, but she sees how the older woman seeks to put the puzzle pieces together. From all accounts, her husband was and is the embodiment of a peaceful life. Some gentle probing of Jess in HR concludes that Eve didn't meet the standards of a traditional wife. This fact is no surprise to Oksana; Eve needs someone that will push her and rattle her expectations, not disappoint them. 

"What's wrong Eve, you have been staring at that piece of paper for the last 10 minutes?"

"Didn't we establish that you find my work deathly boring, 'shuffling money around for minor players in Europe and failed Communist states'? Eve quotes without looking up from her laptop. 

'Well, you do have maps of Eastern Bloc capitals in your office, geography is so dull. I need greater incentives to learn such things." Oksana manages to keep the whine out of her voice. 

"Like flying over such capitals in a shiny piece of black ops technology that would make Mossad jealous?" 

"Everything at our company is legal and complies with both civil and international aviation laws," Oksana parrots reflectively. 

"Having at least 50 lawyers at your disposal will do that for a company," Eve agrees sardonically. 

For the first time, the older woman studies Oksana as she hovers in the doorway. For once the pilot feels self-conscious in her Vasiliev Aviation leather jacket and casual jeans. Oksana has an enviable closet of designer clothes that she updates every season but seeing Eve is the priority for changing out of her work uniform.

"Whatever that document is it isn't work-related. If it were you would be using one of those ridiculous pens," Oksana gestures vaguely. 

"Niko wants my opinion on what we should do with the embryos we froze, it’s a murky area that has no clear guidelines for legally. I pay for the storage, but technically we both need to sign off."

"Right. This calls for vodka, of the authentic Russian kind." 

***

Eve wants to win their game at any cost, it’s a shame she doesn't know the rules. 

Surprisingly enough, stealing time away from the busy schedule of a lawyer isn't too tricky. It helps that Eve spent the majority of her divorce proceedings drowning in work and avoiding the pleas from HR to take time off. Now she restricts herself to something close to a routine. 

Vasiliev Aviation and their pilots cannot claim a smooth or regular schedule. The team is the middle of doing feasibility studies on a new prototype that could lead to a significant government contract. The design has a fantastic manoeuvrability and fuel conservation. All the testers were salivating at the idea of taking this machine into the sky. This phase of the operation is a while off; usually, Oksana would resent the intrusion. However, this cycle gives her more time to focus on Eve. 

"Children were never a priority or practical for me and him. My profession means long hours and unpredictable travel. Niko was fine with that decision and said that teaching was all the exposure to children he needs." 

Oksana avoids intimate conversations at all costs. When you are a young and attractive woman with a career that people write books and move about, dancing away from a topic doesn't take much effort. She wasn't lying when she assured Carolyn that things were different with Eve Polastri. For some reason, she wants to know all the details when it comes to her, even about potential Polish babies. 

"Why make embryos then?" she asks cautiously. 

"We both had health scares early in our marriage. Me with a potential autoimmune disease and Niko with early signs of prostate cancer markers. There were so many uncertainties we took doctors’ advice to invest in an insurance policy. Neither of us was 100% sure about not having kids at the time." 

"Are you ok now?" Oksana asks fixating on a single notion of Eve's health. 

"I'm never going to pass anything like your zero gravity physicality tests, Fly Girl but all my tests were benign in the end." 

"What will you do about the embryos in storage?" 

Eve shrugs and continues to pick at her salad without much enthusiasm. 

"Aside from drinking lots of wine and shedding tears over a life that never was and I would be useless at, I don't know. Luckily, there is still time before any final decisions."

"I still say he is an idiot for leaving you." 

"I still say you are biased but surprisingly compassionate considering this topic means little to you."

***

"Give me your best argument for not going out with me at least once." 

It's gratifying to see how high Eve jumps when Oksana sneaks into her office well past the end of business hours. Eve looks somewhere between sophisticated and adorable in her dress-down clothes. The faint sound of a K-Drama on the computer makes Oksana smile. Maybe she can become another one of Eve's guilty pleasures. 

"What are you on about now, Oksana?" 

"You came first in your class for debate and mock court appearances. Somewhere in America, your family has drawn full of awards," Oksana explains with a smile. 

"How did you..." 

"Your alma mater is so very proud of one of its favourite daughters; it didn't take too much detective work."

Eve looks thoughtful rather than offended at this revelation and turns off her computer to give Oksana her full attention. There is a speculative gleam in her eyes as she regards the younger woman for several long moments. 

"If anybody should be wasting time making arguments close to midnight, it's you. The arguments against a 28-year-old pilot dating woman in her forties don't need explaining. Why you think this a worthwhile venture is a mystery to me. By my calculation you have spent 27 hours flirting with me, that is plenty of time seduce models, social media darlings and few princesses. Why are you so determined?" 

Oksana feels monetarily off balance. Formal education was an exercise in boredom and futility until she joined the Air Force. Eve's questioning and steady gaze bring up those memories. None of her comebacks feel right in this particular case. 

"Don't you dare start with 'age doesn't matter' - you are too smart for such a sentimental cliche, that is the domain of idealistic groupies and power-hungry gold diggers. Of course, ages plays a role, in our attention span if nothing else," Eve continues with a warning glare. 

"I am young, Eve, not blind; of course, age plays a role. Pilots like me are always racing the clock against slowing in reflective and mandatory evaluations. Age and experience dominate most experiences in life." 

Eve continues to watch her with her hands neatly folded on her desk. There is nothing but the vague sound of email alerts chiming on the computer. 

"Your age is one of your most attractive features. You understand the world and the people in it; you can handle bills, civil responsibility and all that nonsense."

"How transactional of you, Miss Astankova. Shall we measure my aptitude for house budgeting next?" Eve looks genuinely amused at the turn of phrase. 

"Isn't my argument allowed to have multiple parts? I was attracted to you from the first moment I saw you doing something approximating skiing, impressive feat considering you were wearing that high vis pink monstrosity on the bunny slope."

"You say that now... in 20 years the story may look a little different with arthritis and additional pounds." 

"Now who’s relying on cliched arguments. Do you know how risky being a test pilot is? I've had those last letters written for nearly ten years. The 'future' isn't my friend either, but right now you, and I are both here."

Eve tilts her head and regards Oksana curiously, waiting for her to continue. There is a slight tremble in the hands, and her knuckles are white. 

"If I have to list everything I find physically attractive about you, it'll be a good idea to remove those Jimmy Cho shoes. We could be here a while, but in the end, things are quite simple.

"You've turned down four dates since your divorce came through and yet you carve out billable hours for lunch and dinner with me, including discussions about everything from embryos to engines." 

Oksana leans forward with a broad grin and dominant posture that reeks of confidence and entitlement. She offers the next statement in a stage whisper. 

"We are already kind of dating, all that is missing is the fun, sexy parts. Although you are doing an excellent job fueling my fantasy and late-night entertainment." 

Eve's body language is a study in contradictions, desire and discontent. 

" I bet you say that to everyone with a pulse and X chromosome." 

Something like curses crosses Oksana features but she covers the emotion with a casual shrug. Eve wants to offer comfort for a moment, but she doesn't move from behind the desk. 

"Give me two months of Tuesdays," she calls as Oksana moves towards the elevator. 

"I am finishing this case and travelling to Holland frequently for trade talks. You are sitting recertification tests. If you still feel the same after our regular lunches on Tuesdays, then we can try something official, Fly Girl."

"Are you asking to court me, Ms. Polastri?" Oksana asks in a sing-song voice. 

"That's not my name outside the professional sphere, and you need controlling more than courting, but let's see how long your attention lasts." 


	3. Aerodynamic Realities

_You're like some kinda lightning_

_You say all of the right things_

_You got me coming alive_

_After all of the hurt I've had_

_Hate how he's still got me_

_Blame it on bad timing_

_You shouldn't come so close_

_When you're looking at me like that_

_If I were you_

_I would be running_

_I would be leaving now_

_If I were you I wouldn't look back_

_Oh, but I want you to_

Eve is learning a whole new language spending time with Oksana. 

Since joining Martens Legal Services, she mostly stayed away from the 'family business' of aviation and the various legal branches. Her division within the firm is far from glamorous, but international trade law remains steady and profitable. Oksana gets more adrenaline in her first 30 minutes on the job than Eve receives in a month. 

Eve regularly hears stories of the new technology and planes that push the limits of engineering and gravity. Weather conditions suddenly become much more relevant when it determines how well the younger woman can fly. Discussions around spend and viable make a whole lot more sense when she’s are hanging around a pilot. 

So far, Oksana is faithfully keeping to their arrangement. Every Tuesday, they meet for lunch and discuss anything and everything that does not involve Eve's work with Carolyn. The staff at the local cafe get to know them by name and bring dishes without asking. The intimacy feels disconcerting, but Eve starts to enjoy the routine away from the office. 

"I risked a dishonourable discharge, but it was worth it." 

Eve winces at the idea of a younger Oksana raising hell in the barracks and causing trouble for everybody foolish enough to issue commands. However, she still managed to graduate with full honours. The notion of Oksana in a uniform isn't unattractive either. 

"As an officer of the court, do I want to know some of your worst exploits? I was serious about having limited jurisdictions to bail you out," Eve cautions 

"Don't be silly; I won't get caught, I know the limits better than the people that wrote our guidelines and codes of conduct," Oksana waves her hand dismissively. 

"Always challenging the boundaries, I bet you were a nightmare as a teenager."

"Carolyn and father almost split over my second arson charge. Having a delinquent as a stepdaughter offends your boss's sensibilities. Teaching me flying was a last resort, even then she moved out for a month."

"How did someone like you get through the rigours and obedience of flight school?"

"My motivation to win kept me going, I knew I have better coordination, condition and reflexes than half the people there. The lack of belief spurs me on. Once again I did not get caught in the act…" 

***

"Are you sure it's ok that I am wondering around the base like this?"

"This isn't the real base, Eve. All the exciting stuff is off-site, but this is where I work most days."

It surprises Eve that the younger woman goes out of her way to make her feel better. The discussions with Niko are becoming increasingly contentious and draining. It's not that he is being vicious or mean spirited. Their divorce is still fresh for the then both and making landmark decisions like the embryos is a difficult one. All the legal document says any action is 'by mutual consent.’ Of course, back then, even the lawyer in Eve could imagine the fault lines in communication. 

"Well, show me what all the fuss is about, Fly Girl."

"It'll be good for you to stretch your legs away from the mountain of books that seem to breed on your desk."

"Oh and I'm sure this little gesture is entirely altruistic, seeing as you have the home-court advantage and look stunning in a leather jacket and such like?" 

"A fringe benefit." 

Eve laughs as she hurries to keep up with Oksana’s longer strides. The place does look moderately intimidating with the fences and guards. Eve is no stranger to confidentiality and sensitivity, but this technology is taking things to a whole new level. 

"Are you winning the race?"

Oksana pauses, in her explanation of the latest experiments. Eve can theoretically understand the value of speed and balance. She knows the influence of private aviation but has never had such an enthusiastic teacher before. It's an effort not to say anything stupid or rash like the fighter on the left looks pretty. 

"The race?"

"With the more prominent companies that seem to be in the news cycles every other day for launching the latest prototypes or eco-car?" Eve explains. 

"We aren't competing in the same market; somebody else can send fat billionaires into space for the thrill of it. It's much more exciting to develop the best planes in this atmosphere. For one thing, you do need to take into account months at a time." 

"So no desire to be an astronaut then and write your glory in the stairs? Imprints on the soil of another planet would be a boast even to your considerable ego." 

Oksana's shudder of disgust is almost comical, and she cannot shake her head fast enough. 

"The numbers of female astronauts are still comparatively small. How would we ever get up to anything more exciting if NASA and the other agencies can't even find suits that will fit?"

***

"Jeez, all I got for my milestone birthday is a car."

Oksana is lovingly patting her plane. which looks nothing like a fighter but still plenty big for Eve. The small white aircraft looks like the models Eve's father hangs in his workshop. The narrow wings do not seem fit to keep anyone in the sky, much less a reckless adrenaline junkie like Oksana. However, Eve has enough sense not to voice her opinion; Oksana is looking at the plane like it is a favourite pet. 

"Once I showed the aptitude, father wanted to get me in the sky quickly, lest I lose interest and waste the heavy tuition."

"Do you get to fly for fun, much? Or is it all test flights and simulations?"

"It depends on the whims of our engineering teams. I am a crash test dummy at their leisure. I still log plenty of private flight time."

"From the way everyone is greeting and talking about you, I suspect you are more than that to the people around here. Even Kenny treats you with awe, in between the rants and uncomfortable dinners." 

"Ah, the good little mouse. My stepbrother must get such timid genes from his father; he threw up for days the first time we took him up. The only flying he can handle is the virtual kind."

Eve winces imagining the timid computer expert trying to survive in the family of three such dominant personalities. She makes a mental note to invite him to lunch with Bill and Elena. Who knows, he might manage a coherent sentence this time. 

"Will you show me how your starter flyer works?" 

"Gladly."

***

"Lunch or dinner?"

"Everything. Why can't pizza be both?"

Oksana is eyeing the slices with such adoration that Eve wonders if there is something illegal in the sauce. The staff is used to the young pilot and her appetite. They spend most of the day admiring different planes and chatting about every topic that didn't involve contentious legal matters or Carolyn. Eve is vaguely surprised to learn she is capable of carrying out such basic conversation. Her social skills seemed to atrophy with her marriage. 

"No reason, I wondering how you afford your weekly food budget in such quantities." Eve picks at her slice with far less enthusiasm. 

"You need fuel for legal arguments, Eve, eat. More importantly, our conversations will become boring if you aren't at the top of your game. Who am I going to argue with if your brains turn to cauliflower? Kenny can't step about anything that doesn't involve computers. Pilots have a single focus."

"I am going to assume there is an appreciation of concern in there somewhere. I'm not hungry, no offence to your feeding pit crew," Eve offers with a smile. 

"I'll figure a way to tempt you in more ways than one," Oksana vows. 

Eve is contending with low-grade depression. It's hardly surprising with the breakdown of her family and the resulting devastation of her parents. It doesn't matter how old she gets, the notion of disappointing her family never becomes any more acceptable. 

Eve doesn't spend much time reflecting. In a way, that is the main attraction of spending time with Oksana. She doesn't see this current version of Eve as inherently broken and doesn't try to moderate the worst of her workaholic tendencies or social awkwardness. It's not because Oksana is younger (though that is a factor), the woman is so free of inhibitions and restraints. Eve can see the appeal of third wives and intergenerational interactions. 

***

"I am going to take you flying one day."

"Oh no, desperately afraid of heights is only one of my phobias."

Eve emphasises her point by moving away from the plane in question holding up her hands in protest. She is almost positive that a fairground hot air balloon ride does not qualify her for such a trip. Oksana is grinning too broadly and looking at Eve with far too much attention and adoration. The remains of the pizza sit heavily in her stomach at the thought of leaving the ground. 

"You won't even notice the way I fly." 

That's precisely Eve's problem, though. She notices everything about Oksana, from her makeup preferences to every flight that she is directing. The lawyer finds herself studying Oksana’s profile on the website and reading about flight techniques on her days off. 

"I bet you say that to all the girls."

"Is it your habit to doubt every time somebody pays you attention or is this the product of your divorce and too much time with my stepmother?"

"I cannot claim to have much experience in twenty-something hotshots flirting with me. Trade and patent lawyers don't tend to get the _Law & Order _treatment in bars. Forgive me if I am not in top form." 

"You still have five Tuesdays to adjust to our new parameters," Oksana counters. 

"By my calculation, we have four lunch dates to go, before my trip to Brussels and the delegation," Eve replies almost absently. 

"The first one barely counts. We were both stuck on the phone, convincing our respective managers that the world isn't ending without us in touching distance."

"There was lunch, and we ate it." 

"At least twenty minutes of conversation and no cell phones are mandatory for this arrangement."

***

"You are careful, aren't you?"

Eve feels ridiculous for saying this comment, but she feels sick looking at the wall in tribute to a pilot that died recently. He seems almost as young as Oksana. Eve vaguely remembers Carolyn taking time off to attend the funeral and tribute services. Oksana explains the crash and mistakes that led to the collision in a cold, dispassionate way. 

Eve cannot get the image of Oksana broken and on the ground in pieces from her mind. There is something so inherently wrong about a brash and confident person succumbing to such a fate. Then again, there is only so much control one can use over life. 

"Careful doesn't work for me, Eve. I would rather take 1000 risks than the slow and suffocating death of boredom. An average job would be like subjecting me to end by 10, 000 papercuts. Nothing compares to pushing the limits of gravity and the human body."

"There is a difference between adrenaline and complete recklessness. In the opinion of this mere mortal," Eve insists firmly. 

"Now who's arguing outside their arena. I can do both things Eve, Konstantin trains me far harder than any of his other apprentices. I could land my Skycatcher in my sleep."

***

"I'm afraid I can't return the favour. You know Martens Legal Services better than I do."

Eve feels like she has a working knowledge of Oksana's work, both in the air and on the ground. Surprisingly, the younger woman keeps the flirtation to a minimum and only makes the occasional comment between explanations. The ground staff and flight teams view the youngest pilot with a mixture of respect and exasperation. 

"There are other aspects of your life that are interesting to me, Eve."

"You are in for disappointments on multiple levels, Fly Girl. I have no discernible life outside of work. My birthday last year was a collection of cards from my dentist and travel agent." Eve objects with a brittle laugh. 

"Out of practice doesn't mean incapable of excitement, Eve. Even Carolyn and my father have dates in his Cessna. Today can be the start of many adventures. You can teach me to obey the laws and boundaries while I convince you to break a few along the way. We can see who corrupts who first," Oksana wagers. 

***

"Be careful with Oksana, Eve. She needs to focus in the coming weeks; a break doesn't mean much." 

"Am I in danger of breaking her? Our time together is limited to tea and noodles. Her bladder may not be entirely happy, but we are merely getting to know each other." 

"You don't have the intent, but both of you have the power to hurt each other deeply. Which, in turn, will impact both my professional and private lives." 

Eve looks up from her briefing papers trying to hide her surprise at Carolyn's candour in the office. She thought her days of tangling before her boss and boss's stepdaughter were over. She has no intention of mentioning their flirting over aeroplanes. 

"Are you ordering me not to spend time with her?" 

Such actions aren't unheard of with legal firms (especially in the era of consent and social media); however, doesn't interfere too severely with either employees or Oksana. 

"No, not at all. In some ways, I think you will be a good influence on her; Oksana genuinely likes spending time with you. I'm just asking you to be careful with her."

"Your stepdaughter is perfectly capable of looking after herself. There are many adjectives to describe her but vulnerable and distractible, don't make a list."

Carolyn tries to avoid bringing personal details into the office. Her husband is one of the wealthiest CEOs in Britain and is the subject of much conjecture in the press. He refuses to grant many interviews for anyone outside the world of aviation, which only adds fuel to the fire. Despite the rumours of exactly how a top EU lawyer met and married a Russian pilot, the celebrity status doesn't influence Martens overly much. 

"Chances are Oksana will move on by next month. She has plenty of women clambering for her attention who aren't middle-aged relationship failures with limited social skills. We are only in week four of our Tuesday lunches."

"I think you underestimate your influence and attractiveness Eve, but I will leave the conversation there. I want to go over the numbers for the Stevens Case."

Eve knows better than to protest the finality in Carolyn's voice. If she were sensible, she would stop meeting Oksana for lunch and ignore the flirting. There is no sense in upsetting her direct manager. She doesn't know where this dynamic with Oksana is heading, but she doesn't want to share things with Carolyn before strictly necessary. 

The truth is she could and should but won't make a move to end their arrangement before the time is up, whatever the consequences. 


	4. Balancing Points

"Are you sure about this Eve? I didn't expect you to be so sentimental, being so adamantly pro-choice and atheist." 

There is no accusation in Niko's voice despite his religious upbringing, merely curiosity and confusion. To his credit, he never tries to suggest conversation to please members of his family. 

"The two positions aren't mutually exclusive. I am choosing to preserve these eggs until I make the decision. 'Pro-Choice' does not automatically mean you treat the decision lightly and without a heavy conscience. 

"That is such a lawyer thing to say."

The old joke between them falls flat. When they were students Niko delighted in teasing her about being a typical lawyer willing to debate any point. Eve would always reply that reasoning and structuring arguments are not solely the domain of the legal profession. The familiarity that made her smile now feels worn and out of synch. 

Eve doesn't hesitate when signing the agreement taking rights and responsibilities for the embryos, though professional habit makes her read every line carefully. There is, to date, no set law about such situations after separations, but the language is still relatively typical and enforceable. Surprisingly, she and Niko manage to get through the lunch discussion without falling into too many disagreements and patterns. It helps that her former husband is happy with a new girlfriend and is splitting his time between Britain and Poland. 

"I want to have the options available to me indeed; I am in a position to make the final call," Eve explains carefully, without looking up from the paperwork. It's not like I can reverse the decision if I regret disposing of them, can I?"

"I don't want anything to do with any potential children or decisions after this; I'm not an arsehole but breaking up with you was hard enough without signing up for further entanglements." Niko insists, his accent thick. 

"Nobody is accusing you of being an arsehole, Niko. I am willing to take over the payments and any and all responsibilities. Things will be easier this way, no remaining ties between us." Eve says, without thinking. 

"You don't seem to suffer many hardships during our breakup, were there many ties to break for you?" 

That slightly bitter comment encapsulates their relationship, in a nutshell, Niko Polastri struggling and failing to understand his now-former wife. Eve isn't going to allow herself to fall into the old pattern of being his friend, too much intimacy between them puts pressure on future relationships. 

"Niko, contrary to popular believe just because I didn't wallow like Bridget Jones doesn't mean I skipped down to divorce court with glee. I didn't end our marriage for some great freedom. We ran the course."

"I was never suffering as much you as seem to believe, but you were so sure about me needing somebody different or more ideal. " 

"Go home to your girlfriend Niko, talking in these circles isn't going to make us feel any better or alter the outcomes." 

Niko looks ready to storm out, but he politely finishes signing the documents and leaves a generous trip. Eve watches him go the restaurant, not bothering to wipe away the tears. 

***

"So you are going to make a Little Eve?" 

Eve genuinely doesn't want to delve into the topic with Oksana; it seems like a weird thing to do with a woman she is maybe deciding to date. For somebody who is mostly shallow and selfish, her lunchtime companion has an eye for detail and the workings of Eve's life no matter how messy. 

"It's not likely with my age and the hours I keep, but I didn't want to destroy the possibility entirely. If there is too much ambivalence I will end up torturing myself, there is enough to feel guilty about without adding that to the mix." Eve shrugs, struggling to articulate her thoughts. 

"I won't have children; my genetics are too much of an unknown disaster with too many crazy or drunk relatives. Although on that basis, most Russians wouldn't qualify to reproduce, yet Mother Russia doesn't have a problem finding young devotees to Putin."

"That makes sense I guess..." 

"I think you made the right decision drawing up the formal paperwork, getting rid of Niko's decision making power in this. No baby should endure that much cabbage."

Eve has a ready-made lecture about cultural stereotypes and defending the lesser-known European nations. She is passionate about the subject and has even done a few interviews in legal and culture circles. Somehow she thinks Oksana Astankova will see the words as a challenge. 

"You don't think you are fairly biased on the subject?" Eve opts to tease instead. 

"Oh, absolutely, but that doesn't make the point any less valid. You look lovely today by the way."

Eve cannot honestly say that she is getting used to Oksana's compliments and overt flirting but the notion is becoming less strange. In some ways, it’s like learning a language again, looking for the tell-tale signs of approval and bashfulness. Nobody flirts like Oksana, but it isn't an entirely foreign concept. 

"Thank you. I have yet to see an outfit that makes you look anything less than stunning but primary colours work well with your skin tone and hair." Eve tries not to sound like a sales associate or something. 

"Russian genes come in handy sometimes. You deserve me making an effort for our 'starter dates.' Let me know if you have any preferences, you will find me accommodating." Oksana offers enthusiastically 

"I'll keep that in mind, but you don't need to make any grand or special effort. My expectations aren't that high. Lunches, Tea and Conversation, is a fine place to start." 

***

"You tricked me!." 

"Didn't your doctor say something about improving your strength and core conditioning? Even then, I am sure you lied about how much time you spend at the office. That's practically a job requirement when you work for Carolyn." Oksana calls down. 

Eve is distracted by both the massive climbing wall and the sight of Oksana scampering up the face without care for gravity or safety. Theoretically, she is demonstrating the beginner wall to Eve but the moves she is making seem more suitable for _American Gladiator. _Oksana appears to find the grips and footholds without even trying or concentrating. 

"Don't let Spiderwoman up there freak you out. Climbing isn't nearly as superhuman as Oksana likes to pretend. She is showing off for you like a peacock with new plumage or something."

"Oksana would show off to the mailman for the sake of it." Eve disagrees without taking her eyes away. 

The man standing beside her looks like the human equivalent of a whippet. Every muscle and tendon in his body refines itself for speed and power. His hair is in a long braid down his back, and his age is hard to guess. 

"There is some truth to that, but I think you hold a special place in her attention. She doesn't bring too many people here; she prefers to wine and dine than at fancy restaurants. Besides, she worries and fusses about you, Eve, which is new. I am Zane by the way, at one time, I had the dubious honour of trying to teach Oksana the basics. It didn't take long for her to outpace me."

"I'm Eve, a novice climber and the one foolish enough to let Oksana 'surprise me' after lunch."

"If you want to teach at a more sedate pace, ask for me at the front desk. Oksana sometimes forgets that people are subject to human frailties like fear and doesn't always explain everything."

"Thanks, I might take you up on that if I make it through the first round." 

"She won't let anything happen to you up there."

***

"You don't trust your body, do you?"

Eve is too busy gasping for air and worshipping solid ground to answer immediately. Oksana is a surprisingly patient teacher and is willing to go over the safety procedures and technical details. Oksana loves to challenge boundaries, but she doesn't compromise on Eve staying safe. It turns out Oksana is a partial owner of this complex and knows every wall and grip intimately. Eve isn't a horrible student and does eventually master the basic moves, but it would be a stretch to say the techniques come quickly. 

"What is your insistence with trying to teach me physical activities well beyond the capacity of somebody in their forties?" 

"What is your instance on being ageist and making stupid arguments with the same fundamental premise? People over forty don't automatically lose the ability to operate their arms and legs. Answer the question, Eve."

"I come from a family of intellectuals. Coordination and rhythm aren't high on our list of genetics gifts. Add to that chronic illnesses as a young adult, and I never got into the habit beyond Yoga and Boot Camp once a year." 

"It's obvious in the way you hold yourself as if you are expecting something to fail or give out." 

Eve wants to disagree, but she can't. The truth is her body did give out her multiple times, and it was almost more stressful watching Niko go through the battery of tests. Middle age has not been cruel to her but not overly kind either, especially the impossible standards of her older Koran relatives. It took her longer than she would like to find a satisfactory selfie for the social media post. 

"Please don't tell me our next adventure is going to involve base jumping of any kind," Eve pleads with mock seriousness. 

"There is no fun in flying if all you are doing is letting gravity assist you to the ground at rapid speeds. The fun lies in defying gravity, not agreeing with old Newton. Will you come climbing with me again one weekend?" 

"If you agree to come to yoga with me or something slightly more sedate. You don't need to exist like a hummingbird, with a fear of missing out, all the time." Eve barters. 

"That sounds like an excellent idea. We can go shopping and hunt out a new summer wardrobe."

"Not my idea of relaxing but I promise to call you if Carolyn insists I attend another gala."

***

"Do I get an interim grade?" 

Eve somewhat spitefully seeks revenge on her 'fitness coach' by insisting that they eat at a local vegan restaurant. The place legitimately does fantastic things with salads, smoothies and desserts. She has a craving for their famous curry, and the owner is an old friend from school — one of the few who manages to stay neutral in the breakdown of 'Eve and Niko' as a couple. 

It doesn't take long to realise that Oksana worships all types of food and is happily devouring their largest serving of curry. She is eyeing Eve's bread with almost predatory interest. Oksana's birthday is coming up maybe they could come here again if that wasn't treading too close to 'coupling'. 

"What are you talking about?"

"In my efforts to convince you that I am capable of pursuing a relationship, do I get a grade at the mid waypoint? Pilots live their lives by testing and professional improvement."

"Interpersonal relationships do not work like that. I promise you I don't have a tally system or a little notebook where I am marking all the details. "

"Now that could be fun." Oksana looks speculative. 

"No, absolutely not we are not turning this into an experiment." 

Eve appreciates the fact that Oksana remains respectful of her space in public. If people were willing to look hard enough, they would assume a date between the women, but few people care to judge. Her friends may report back to Niko that she is dating a (younger) woman but Eve doubts it. She doesn't have many friends, but the ones here are loyal, and nobody wants to add to Niko's pain for no reason but spite. 

"Evie! I heard a rumour you were eating your weight in Red Curry again. It is about time you took a break from those law texts and had a real night out."

Eve smiles with genuine affection as her friend Walt approaches the table. His grin wide and his arms open for the obligatory bone-crushing hug. For all the vegan clichés the man has ox-like strength and decked a guy for racist comments about Eve on the night of graduation.

"I couldn't stay away for too long, Walt. My friend Oksana approvals heartily as you can tell from the multiple orders." Eve makes the introductions. 

Oksana musters the energy to nod in between bites. Walt doesn’t blink at the unseal display merely wishes them a pleasant evening and insists on paying for their drinks.

***

"Surprising."

Oksana turns around to regard Eve curiously from the front steps of her apartment. Somehow she manages to make the act of going upstairs look grateful. Eve can still barely move from the adventures in rock climbing, but the ache makes her feel satisfied as well. Maybe there is something to say for Oksana's strange brand of exercise therapy after all. 

"What?" 

"If I were going to give you a grade on our lunch dates so far it would be 'S' for surprising. I was expecting you to lose interest and motivation long before now. There is only so much tea and noodles can offer by way of inducement." Eve explains with a half-smile. 

"I can work with surprising at this point, but you haven't seen anything yet, Eve. I want to show you everything within my power and if you would let me I will fly you to Paris for the weekend." Oksana begins earnestly. 

"Take it easy Aladdin; we are sticking to a 50 quid budget for each date on Tuesday, not Vasiliev opulence. No magic carpet rides Fly Girl." 

"I can work within those restrictions, unfair as they are. I reserve the right to make a fuss on your birthday."

Eve prides herself on being and becoming an excellent negotiator. Her CV under Carolyn's careful tutelage speaks for itself. The rest of Europe isn't thrilled with British legal firms right now, but she is still making progress for their clients with gifts from various home countries to prove it. The divorce was horrendous and emotionally draining, but even the division stays relatively calm under her guidance. With all these, not inconsiderable skills, Eve still finds herself willingly losing ground to a woman half her age who is far from the sensible choice for a trade lawyer in a respectful firm. 

"Presuming this little arrangement lasts long enough for special occasions, we can stretch the budget to 65 pounds." Eve concedes with more amusement than genuine ranker. 

Oksana looks ready to pout and launch a counter protest, but they both have early starts in the morning. Eve is still feeling drained from the final agreement with Niko and doesn't need the added distraction of Oksana in her home environment. 

"Those are the rules, don't sulk, think of it as one more point in my favour; I won't bankrupt your wallet or carbon footprint," Eve advises teasingly. 

"Fine."

If this were a movie, Eve would allow a chaste kiss with charming smiles and promises to call, but she likes this pace better. Her post-separation sex life was confusing and conflicting, full with far too many Carrie Bradshaw clichés. She is genuine in testing Oksana's commitment; there is no doubt they could successively navigate a passionate and thrilling sexual fling. But she isn't going to risk her professional standing and security with Carolyn for such a comparatively minor prize.

"I'll see you next Tuesday, then. Good luck with the flight simulations and stay safe." 

Oksana offers a blinding smile. 

***

"Oksana is frightening me, Mum." 

"That's hardly an unusual state of affairs, Kenny, care to be more specific on that matter?" 

Carolyn carefully closes her ledger and gives her son full attention. She can't claim any major prizes when it comes to motherhood or the raising of her son. Wealth and intense career ambitions meant that she was fortunate enough to have support in the form of nannies, tutors and minders. When he shows such an appetite for science, logic and computing, it is easy enough to abdicate her responsibilities to S.T.E.A.M projects. However, she does make an effort to be present in his life when he seeks her out. 

It's a long-standing joke between her and Konstantin, that the children they brought into the union are a study in opposites. Kenny, with his debilitating shyness and lack of confidence and Oksana's ego, ambition and boundless social energy. It took years and a small fortune in professional guidance and supervision to reach a middle ground. By unspoken agreement, Konstantin works to tutor Kenny in the ways of the world from somebody who has had wild and varied experiences. Carolyn does her best to temper Oksana's obsessive eccentricities or at least guide them productively. Her husband gets the better part of that deal, but she doesn't mind overly much. 

"She is hassling Jono and Hamish about where they take their girlfriends to dinner and the precise budgets; it's getting creepy when she wants to see receipts.” 

"I'll talk to her, Kenny. I am sure your friends will recover from the trauma of answering a few financial questions. Remember you scored considerable points by boasting about your sister. It is not all bad."

Oksana saves her the trouble by striding into the room and flopping onto the couch with a dramatic sigh. Strangely enough, she is spending more time at home and not parading endless conquests to provoke a reaction. 

"You couldn't find a more reliable source for information that Kenny's friends? Plenty of websites provide ideas for cheap dates in the city. Was it strictly necessary to frighten?" 

"Necessary no, fun yes. Besides Jono is dating a lawyer with inconvenient ethical standards so he actually has some decent advice. 

"Let Kenny have his friends Oksana you aren't going to win the wager with Eve by listening to the advice of that crowd. For one thing, Eve is considerably older than your brother's friends."

"That doesn't..." 

Carolyn blinks in surprise at the defensiveness in her stepdaughter’s voice. Maybe this isn’t simply a seduction game after all. Trying to judge Oksana’s motivation can be impossible at times but the Eve Problem is a unique development.

“I wasn’t judging her age merely your reference points, expand your horizons.”

“Are you offering some inside information, Carolyn?”

“Consider me Switzerland in this situation, with a few investments in the matter.”

“Cowardness.”

“Wisdom.”


	5. Opposition Research

_Girl, ain't no kindness in the face of strangers_

_Ain't gonna find no miracles here_

_Well you can wait on your blesses my darlin'_

_But I got a deal for you right here_

_I ain't lookin' for praise or pity_

_I ain't comin' 'round searchin' for a crutch_

_I just want someone to talk to_

_And a little of that Human Touch_

_Just a little of that Human Touch_

_Ain't no mercy on the streets of this town_

_Ain't no bread from heavenly skies_

_Ain't nobody drawin' wine from this blood_

_It's just you and me tonight_

_So you've been broken and you've been hurt_

_Show me somebody who ain't_

_Yeah, I know I ain't nobody's bargain_

_But, hell, a little touchup_

_and a little paint_

_You might need somethin' to hold on to_

_When all the answers, they don't amount to much_

_Somebody that you could just to talk to_

_And a little of that Human Touch_

Bruce Springsteen- Human Touch

"I need you to do background research for me."

"A) There are legalities about such things B) This firm isn't your private investigation agency C) Last but not least, Niko Polastri is a decent human being without glaring moral failings, job done." 

Carolyn tries to gage Oksana’s mood and response to this proclamation. This entanglement between Eve and her stepdaughter is problematic on multiple fronts, but it is also strange. For one thing, Oksana is seeking advice and not making a game out of sneaking around, pushing the line between eccentric and acceptable that only the young and exceptionally beautiful can get away with regularly. 

"That's not what I need, Carolyn; Eve tells me all about Niko and their ‘hypothetical not-babies.’" Oksana is exceptionally impatient with her inability to be psychic. 

Carolyn treats her interactions with Oksana a little like a hostile witness for the crown. She doesn't practice that kind of law any more, but the parcels are usual. They are sitting calmly in the living room of the family home, but Oksana is pacing the room like a lost bird without a window. Konstantin's insistence on downtime between her flights isn't doing the situation any good. All that energy without a focus can be a destructive thing. It isn't hard for Carolyn to see the girl child she agreed to take on when marrying the man. 

Oksana manages to rein her movements enough to face Carolyn and explain herself more decisively, complete with verbs and nouns. There is a vulnerable excitement to the action that the former orphan from Russia rarely allows herself to express, least of all to her "British Step Master' (to use one of her more colourful descriptions). 

"Things are progressing well with Eve, better than I could ever hope for, on so many levels. But you and I both know she sees a rehabilitated imagine of Oksana Anatoljevna Astankova, the genius's daughter, complete with social skills and fewer pyromaniac tendencies. You and mother moulded me entirely using Russian grit and British scheming, with the added advantage of fast things that fly."

"I wouldn't put things in those terms, Oksana, every human on the planet goes through growing pains, yours were simply more extreme than the norm." Carolyn disagrees amiably. 

"There is plenty to find behind this shiny coating." 

"You want me to do a background check on you and give it to Eve."

"Something like that." 

Carolyn looks at the younger woman speculatively and gestures for the chair. There is no way she is going to give in to demands entirety, but there are avenues to explore if Oksana is wanting to commit to this place and not another conquest. 

***

"These are for you." 

Eve learns over the last few months to view such proclamations with a healthy degree of skepticism. While there is a (hopefully firm) agreement about gifts and grand gestures, Oksana takes being sneaky to an art form and finds all sorts of presents that are 'on sale' with more regularity than is statistically likely. 

Eve hefts the document folder experimentally, long practice allowing her to judge that this isn't an official brief, even though the packaging is. Carolyn is obsessive about such protocol, and all their mail is neatly labeled, and they only use about three carriers. As Brexit comes into being there are security concerns even in her low-security branch of the law. 

The documents inside aren't any form of gift or flirtation. The summary reports lay everything out stark detail. Eve reads enough information packets from investigators to know what she is seeing and what it relates to; she closes the folder quickly. Experiencing physical action is far more satisfying than merely exiting out of a browser. 

"I don't need a briefing on somebody in my personal life, Oksana, even if the two things are intermeshing in a way that is unorthdox." Eve insists, almost physically pushing the material away. 

"There are things you need to know before deciding about our next course of action, my proverbial grading system if you will," Oksana argues, waving her hands in fustration. 

"Then you will tell me about each of them when and if they come up. You are not a subject for dissection, Oksana, or a statue in the law libraries fit for revision." 

"Researching is your thing, I'm offering you everything on a silver platter." Oksana tries to push the documents back across the table. 

"Thank you for the gesture, Oksana, but I, perhaps alone amongst your romantic engagements, do not need the prompt. Do you think you were the only one obsessively noting down details? We are sticking to the original rules of engagement." Eve tries for her best authoritative tone. 

***

"Can I ask you something?"

They are in their regular place for lunch and inhaling large bowls of speciality Ramen Noodles. It's another restaurant that Walter owns, and Oksana has a taste for the vegan and vegetarian options. The dishes seem to settle better on before or after a long flight. There is still an odd tension between them since Eve rejects Oksana's profound and troubling offer of radical honesty. 

"Yes, but I can almost guarantee the most exciting answers will be in the file you refuse to read." Oksana insists with mock frustration. 

"The last time I dated was well before the era of social media and readily available demographics, call it a difference in our generations. I let you buy me more earrings that Elizabeth Taylor ever needed, count that a victory." 

"Everything is well within budget, My Lady." Oksana doesn't even try for a sincere tone of reference. 

"What _would _we do if you had your way and could take me anywhere and woo me with all the power and influence and your disposal? If we weren't operating using my Dating Survival Guide?" Eve asks with genuine curiousity. 

"We would go to Paris and see the City of Lights at five am when there are fewer tourists to suck the place of all its dignity. I would give you a sensory experience you would never forget in all the cities of Europe, reinventing your wardrobe at every stop."

"That does sound rather lovely, maybe after things conclude in Brussels." Eve gives an encouraging smile. 

"I am going to win, you know, this little game of ours. You will see me as a worthy lover and future companion." Oksana sounds as if she is making a solemn vow. 

"I was playing for keeps somewhere between the rock wall and discussing the comparative merits of various embryo storage facilities. The odds are not in our favour, domesticity or not." 

"The odds were never in my favour; Eve, it's practically my natural state of being. Things will come up, you know, no matter how noble your intentions." 

"Do you not remember the whole embryo and messy separation thing on my end. Something will always come up on either side of a new relationship situation, especially when you insist on pursuing someone from such a different background." Eve argues calmly. 

"My long line of ex-girlfriends and flings will have your one mistake beat for the drama stakes, it wasn't exactly the 'girl in every port' scenario but close at one stage." 

"One of the advantages of being over 40 is you develop the ability to say no without remorse. If this fails, then I will survive to write another brief." 

"Our regular Tuesday lunches will finish soon, and you will fly to Brussels for enthralling negotiations. Are we going to be celebrating and commiserating at the end of our probation period?"

"I like the current pace of things; there wasn't anything in the fine print that said we need to deescalate or pick up the pace in any meaningful way, is there?" 

"Maybe not, but I will be asking you to do the millennial version of going steady with me." Oksana jokes with a smile. 

***

"I'm seeing someone, and it is still in the early stages, but I wanted you to know before anything became public, there is a certain level of fame involved."

Eve is frankly surprised that Niko accepts her Skype request, let alone that he is willing to listen attentively. As much as they are both working hard to make the final separation civil, breaks are rarely without contention entirely. The situation at the cryobank is one example that is bringing up memories. 

"Thank you for letting me know, the guys at the Bridge Club will want to offer far too much sympathy. They are still adjusting to the notion that we are no longer 'Niko and Eve.'"

There is no reason for them to be having this line of communication. Niko is happily dating Eve's polar opposite and freely sharing on Instagram. At the same time, deliberately causing this man pain is no longer pleasant. Interactions are no longer on a scorecard system of bitterness and resentment. The embryo paperwork is a healthy step in the right direction. 

"Does he make you happy and is your mother going to be hassling me at two am again because she never remembers the time difference. My Korean isn't any better than your Polish." Niko says dryly. 

"_She _is becoming important to me, and there is no way my mother will consider this much less accept such a decision." Eve studies the screen for any sign of a reaction. 

One of the things that Eve loves most about Niko is that he wouldn't last five minutes in her professional work. His moustache and facial hair are practically telegraphing to his every thought and feeling. For the first few years their communication was straightforward and a relaxing break from hours of wordplay and josting. 

"Is that your thing now, woman?" he asks eventually. 

"No as a general rule, just one woman at this stage."

**

There is no real way to make or mark this relationship as being official. 

Eve knows she is a little ridiculous and self defeatest for seeing a therapist this late in the relationship progression, but she needs an objective ear. Arianna Grayson is far too professional to convey disapproval or judgement, but there is a trace of disappointment in her client that only long association can undercover. 

"I am starting to see someone, and despite my best intentions, it's becoming something with feelings, and I don't know what to do about it."

"Did you want this potential relationship not to involve feelings or involve feelings only as they exist in controllable dosages?" Arianna asks without taking notes. 

"Is almost painfully and embarrassingly cliche to admit out loud, but somehow my neat lines are blurring, which is so frustrating, I was always a kid who loved staying in the margins, surprise!" Eve points out with a shrug. 

"Will you tell me about this relationship in whatever detail you feel comfortable?" Ariana 

"_She _is a pilot and almost twenty years younger than me. The heiress stepdaughter of my boss. We have been seeing each other for several months." Eve rattles off the stats almost automatically. 

"Those factors seem an interesting contrast to your previous circumstances and relationships. Do you find yourself reacting in different ways?" Arianna asks with something close to genuine curiosity. 

"That's all you have to say? Did you miss the part about entire decades separating us?" 

"My basic arithmetic isn't that poor; the age gap is significant. However, those particular details are less important than your reaction to them and subsequent decision making. You pay me for guidance, not snap judgements." 

"Didn't you spend months outlining why I needed to spend time recovering from the breakup with Niko and parental disproval across three continents?" Eve challenges.

"The subtext to that instruction wasn't ‘Eve Polastri is so broken she shouldn't consider ever having a relationship again.’"

"Even you can admit I am far from your star pupil, even if my ability to homework exercises is almost pathological and a reason for therapy itself." 

"It's a facility that a) progress is a linear system from bad to better b) therapists have favourite people. You have the right to start again, Eve." 

***

"Do you have a moment?" 

Oksana does a creditable job of hiding her surprise as she looks down from her position on the climbing wall. Eve is standing at the base, looking at up at her with an unreadable expression. Somehow her offer to reveal the extent of her dating history triggers something in their delicate dance. 

"Give me a second." 

Oksana wants to fly down the wall and land theatrically next to Eve, but the staff here will kill her in paperwork if she falls again. She has something of a reputation in the climbing community too and doesn't need this hobby taken away on a technicality. 

"It wouldn't take a second to get you in a kit if you want to join the fun? Beanpole is willing to tutor you." Oksana offers while still feeling strangely nervous. 

Eve looks good in her power suit, but the look is strangely formal for the environment. Her make up is minimal, and her hair is in an elaborate French twist that Oksana immediately approves. 

"I told my therapist about you." Eve blurts, without giving any context. 

"Okay, I bet there was plenty to say on that topic, did they bring up your dreams and the thousand ways I am unsuitable for you in the post-divorce world?" Oksana hates the way her accent becomes thicker with every world. 

"Not in the slightest, she earns enough money to maintain a judgement-free zone. My communication skills need to work along with almost everything else. Thankfully, I am getting mate rates for long term attendance. This stunt is the middle-aged wreck version of making things official, complete with CBT homework." Eve explains, suddenly flushing with embarrassment and uncertainty. 

"I don't need to know the details, and you are far from a wreck, Eve. Maybe we can be versions of broken together?" Oksana suggests without looking from the rig she is dismantling. 

Eve kisses her in public without a second thought. 


	6. Ghosts in Machines

_"I have learned that if you must leave a place that you have lived in and loved and where all your yesteryears are buried deep, leave it any way except a slow way, leave it the fastest way you can. Never turn back and never believe that an hour you remember is a better hour because it is dead. Passed years seem safe ones, vanquished ones, while the future lives in a cloud, formidable from a distance: _Beryl Markham, English Novelist 

"You are a reckless idiot." 

"I was expecting there to be more tears and disappointment." 

Oksana's words sound genuinely curious as if she doesn't understand either the human condition or the interactions with Eve specifically. A side effect of her long experience with such things. she doesn't move while the older woman dabs ice on her rapidly swelling face. 

"Tears are for sadness, not anger, its practically the first rule of law school, figure out your emotions. If I cry over all the time your romantic life comes into play, I'd be in danger of dehydration." 

Of course, this particular instance reaches unprecedented levels of Oksana oddness. The daughter of an influential organised crime group did not take their breakup well and was not shy about using daddy's money and resources to let her former lover know. The fact that the woman in question is due to marry in a few months is beside the point. Oksana doesn't want to become a mistress in all but name. Oksana's rejection of such an offer did not end well. 

"Do you have to use so much alcohol, they are superficial at best. Kenny hits harder than that, and he has the coordination of a watermelon." Oksana objects as Eve rubs a little too vigorously. 

"I told you my first aid skills were rusty, and it is your fault for coming to me without medical clearance anywhere. What Georgina did is assault."

"Please like your NHS cares about such a minor bust-up between ex-lovers, same for the police." 

Eve doesn’t bother to argue with the opinion. The superficial cuts aren’t worth going into the wait list. Oksana is sensible enough to take precautions for wound care, somebody who lives to defy gravity knows how to deal with the rough and tumble. Even the most careful person can make mistakes in dangerous situations.

***

"I _told _you to read the file. You can't force me out because you can't face reality." Oksana hisses angrily 

Eve vaguely gestures for Oksana to take a seat in her office without looking up from her laptop. There are piles of notes on her desks, and several office lines are ringing off the hook. Her guest is far from subtle in waiting impatiently to gain Eve's direct attention. It feels like an audience with her stepmother. 

"I wasn't lying about the timetable for Brussels, Oksana. The two situations aren't connected in any way, assuming you don't have any violent exes waiting in the shadows?"

The seconds tick by and it seems like Oksana is actually running mental calculations in her head and weighing the measures of sin and probability. Eve tries not to wince when no reassurance follows such a blatant invitation. 

"That's bullshit. If you managed to flirt with me in Paris while meeting the President of France you can pick up the bloody phone."

"To be fair, your efforts at translation were far more amusing than then professional services. Darling, I genuinely can't control the timetable. Even Carolyn Martens is submitting to the higher powers on this one. " Eve uses the term of endearment without much thought.

" Georgina doesn't mean anything to me, if that's what you are worried about; it was a fling while I was at a nearby airbase." Oksana tries to explain. 

"Oh, I'm sure she didn't mean anything to you. You don't need to assure me of that particular fact. Her feelings on the topic are made particularly clear in a series of threats with hashtags and memes."

"Why are you mad at me for something I can't control?"

"Being mad would be easier to feel."

***

"I wouldn't advise holding Oksana to traditional standards for relationships, it’s a recipe for heartache."

"And I wouldn't advise playing the role of go-between on this particular matter. We have enough on the schedule without blurring the professional and personal lines. The stock market jitters are going to escalate this time."

"Neither of us is lacking in the ability to multitask, and the stocks will recover before the negotiations. Our primary objectives do not change on that front." 

"Do Downing Street and Westminster share your predictions?" 

Eve knows how to speak respectfully to her boss, but the older woman values intellect and the ability to argue over blind obedience. Carolyn Martens fills a relatively obscure part of the British legal profession, but that does not mean she is without power and influence. Those papers and gossip mags that say she married wealth and high society don't know anything. 

"Quit using work to avoid your personal problems. It didn't work the first time with Niko, and it won't make any difference in this situation. Whatever you issues with Oksana, please address them directly for all our sakes."

"Are you a neutral party in this scenario?"

"I never claim to be anything close to such things when it comes to my family, even the strange woman that is my stepdaughter. You know the entanglement that we would face as soon as you accepted the first lunch date and a piece of jewellery. Stop acting like the two things can be separate."

***

"I hate the idea of you being so reckless now that you have a girlfriend who could be a clone for the Kardashians." 

Eve knows the statement isn't entirely honest, but one thing being a lawyer teaches you is the nuances of truth. The cliches about her profession exist for a reason. A large portion of her training and job revolves around arguing technical details for profit. Any guilt on the matter balances out by considerable pro bono work for smaller businesses caught in Brexit chaos. Emotional compartmentalising is vital in her life. 

Oksana looks deeply skeptical, but for once she doesn't make a sarcastic quip or challenge her on the point she merely sits in the office and waits for the next bit. Test pilots don't make decisions without complete information either; such decisions can be the decision between life and death. She confines her recklessness to the world outside flying, which is something of a relief. 

"I wasn't kidding about not wanting to judge your past forensically. Carolyn already offered such information too. I can deal with my petty mortal failings alone; however, if you are going to act like a human wrecking ball, that is not ok. Those approaches only end well on shows like _The Sopranos or Sons of Anarchy, _even then that's debatable. I don't have the making of a Ride or Die side check."

"You need time to process?" Oksana gestures without much inflection in her voice. 

"I need time in front of my spreadsheets and outcome measures. I can't give this development my full attention until everything is on the desk, literally and figuratively, of the ambassador." 

The best lies contain more than a few elements of truth. 

***

"You can't judge me for being anything less than who I am either, Oksana."

Eve waits until the rock climbing gym is empty and Oksana is using it as her private training facility. The other staff are willing to clear out early and avoid a moody and unpredictable boss. Walt is the only that appears genuinely worried about his friend and calls Eve to try and intervene. 

"What are you talking about?" Oksana calls down from her high perch at the top of the hardest wall.

"Didn't we establish a rule about not having these conversations when you are in the middle of defying gravity? Come down here so we can at least pretend to talk like rational adults." Eve bargains, trying not to wince at the height.

"No." 

Oksana sounds so much like a petulant child that Eve rolls her eyes. Her almost girlfriend/flirting stalker is acting nothing like the Casanova that woman is willing to throw away everything for. 

"Fine then. You knew exactly how I was before beginning this ridiculous courtship. I know you have a warped view of ordinary, but even you know that having a crime boss's daughter acting like a lovesick puppy doesn't happen regularly. We aren't pitching for a reality TV show." 

***

"Do you want to read the file now at least? Or at least hear about the thing with Daniella and her two-bit mobster father? who likes to pretend he knows crime?"

"No, my stance hasn't changed from last week. I trust that you will tell me things, but I'm perfectly capable of Googling."

"You'll just give me a long lecture about recklessness and responsibility before phasing me out for a while?" Oksana asks, somewhere between knowing and disappointed. 

"As long as you can promise that the rest of your ex-lovers are somewhere closer to the spectrum of regular human beings than we shouldn't be having this conversation on repeat. I tried marrying a thoroughly decent and morally inflexible person; it didn't work out so well for me." Eve disagrees with a shrug. 

"I never date ordinary people Eve, normal is boring. The mistake with Georgina was that she didn't have enough to lose. Why do you think they are all engaged, married or from wealthy families? The fear of exposure stops them for clinging like a barnacle." Oksana explains, almost scientifically. 

"I think you may need to revise your version of Game Theory or whatever; it has considerable flaws."

"You are my exception to the Game Theory. I think you might be my Theory of Everything."

The words are less of a romantic declaration and more of fierce promise. However, Eve is getting used to the intensity that is part of Oksana's nature, and this behaviour doesn't frighten her nearly as much. 

***

"Are there new rules for this thing?"

It would be a lie to say they are experiencing an easy silence. Neither woman is exceptionally comfortable with open and intimate conversations, not with their respective pasts. However, hunger for noodles and perfectly seasoned broth can overcome a lot of issues. They are having a late dinner at their new favourite vegan restaurant. 

There were so many conversations between them that have the potential to explode--the age, work, parental expectations and the differences in culture. It surprises Eve that these types of disagreements don't occur with more regularity. Adrianna and every other therapist in the world advise against borrowing trouble from the future, but Eve is more of a realist than anything else. When she didn't reject Oksana's gifts and flirtations outright, she was asking for trouble. 

"We are operating by a relationship version of military exercises, Fly Girl; you can have an opinion." Eve tries to joke, but she mainly sounds tired.

"Win a negotiation against step mummy's best negotiator and a lawyer? Should I rate my chances then?" Oksana mocks in a sing-song voice. 

"Don't make me sound like some sort of pet on retainer. You have managed to persuade me to enjoy rock climbing, don't doubt your skills at this particular table."

"Still you must react...everybody does in one way your another, right from Mrs. Franklon who couldn't believe that fire was accidental." Oksana offers in a rare show of not wanting to change the topic.

"Keep the skeletons in your closest dancing in private, and we should be ok, or as much as an odd couple with a twenty-year age difference can be." 

***

"You need to decide if you want the same pattern."

"Have a good time with your dear therapist, then?"

Oksana's tone is carefully neutral, but Eve can see the tension in her body, even as she does the familiar routine of cleaning the aeroplane. There is one way in which they are similar in personality. Eve understands when Oksana drags her to the airfield to start cleaning her beloved first plane. They both need something practical to do when they are trying to relieve a stressful situation. Eve would much rather be standing in a freezing hanger than imagining Oksana in some wild club, with no rules and fewer restrictions on mixing drugs. 

"Yes, as a matter of fact, she tends to encourage me to come in after significant events happen. I think this ranks somewhere between getting divorced and the horror of the Tories getting a mandate through this time in the UK."

"Stop babbling, Eve, and get to the point." 

Oksana looks wound like a violin string ready to snap. Eve winces at the angle she is balancing herself on the plane, but she trusts the mental framework carries Oksana's light and graceful weight without too many issues. 

"You can push my limits and ask me to experience new things, from rocking climbing and daring avant garde shows to all your tricks of lesbian seduction. All those extremes work, and we always dance to your wild Russian ballet. Whatever you do, I am still going to be a middle-aged woman from a conservative immigrant Korean background. It’s quite literally my job to obey and shape laws."

"I know who you are, Eve."

"We know each other, and strangely and bizarrely, we work well together. In the same way, I can't expect you to be any less of the Fly Girl from the movies you can't expect a metamorphose into post Leather Jacket Sandy from _Grease._ That's a..." 

"You are older than me Eve, not from a different century or royal reign in Europe. I know what _Grease_ is and the story of Danny and Sandy, the ending was stupid though. Stockard Channing was a far more interesting character." 

"We can watch her movies and TV shows in a marathon this weekend if you want. Carolyn is insisting on upgrading the security procedures at the office so I won't be logging my usual hours."

***

"I have no idea what she sees in you."

Eve supposes it is something of a cliche, but she never expects to face any genuine danger from Oksana's list of women. Honestly, the woman waiting for her in the car park looks more pathetic than threatening. Martens Legal Services spares little expense when it comes to security. The precautions extend to Eve's home in particular because of her long association with Konstantin and his dealings. They weren't specifically worried about Georgina and her obsessions, but her family might have something to say now or in the future.

"That makes two of us, but you shouldn't be here, Ms. Koslov. Chasing after Oksana is as productive as chasing a ghost."

The young woman is about Oksana's age, but there the similarity ends. Georgina spends far more time in the makeup chair than getting any physical exercise. Her hair looks like it took hours to complete, and she is wearing valuable jewellery. Despite having a social media presence and a reputation to lose, she doesn't make any effort to conceal her identity. 

"This ghost seems happy to haunt all the places where you are. 

The slap was sharp but poorly aimed and is more surprising than painful. Eve tenses waiting for an attack or a fit of rage like something out of Mob Wives. Her check stings and she feels slightly dizzy. The other woman doesn’t move from her sad almost defeated posture. It is unlikely she is entirely alone and Eve doesn’t want to encounter any bodyguards or other people on the protection payroll.

“I believe you have cake to sample in the morning, Georgina, there is no need to waste the deposit and all that gold leaf and buttermilk frosting. We can leave this little incident at the door, nobody needs to even know you were here, technical difficulties with the CCTV.”

Eve tries not to jump as Carolyn emerges from the shadows of the building looking as if the are discussing the unseasonal weather or the charges on the tube. Georgia glowers defiantly but shrinks as the older woman comes closer. Eve wonders how much experience Carolyn has with a parade of heartbroken woman.

“It was a terrible idea to use my stepdaughter to pursue your sexual identity crisis, it would be a worse move to pretend the fling has any more meaning and should shape your life choices, leave now before anyone needs to know.” Carolyn instructions with absolute conviction.

“Does she need her fake mummy to defend her now?”

“Leave!”

Eve has seen flashbacks of her first few weeks at the firm and cowering in fear from the boss. The woman is intimidating when she wants to be, especially when it comes to protecting her firm or family. Georgina is no match for experience and determination. Eve watches as Georgia slinks away towards her chauffeured car, stopping only to glare before flinging herself into the backseat.

“What are you doing here, how did know she would show up?”

“I needed Oksana to sign some family trust documents and the Koslovs are a predictable bunch. Come along Eve, lets not bait the lion.”

***

"Are you ok?"

"She wasn't nearly as threatening as she wanted to believe, especially after genuine gangs in Eastern Europe."

It is a complete lie. Eve isn't anywhere near as physically tough as Oksana. Still, there is something pathetic about complaining over a slap and punch delivered by a heartsick kid with an overgrown sense of entitlement. Eve has her pride if not the coordination to avoid the hit the first place. Luckily it's unlikely that Georgina will dare to come here again, not with Carolyn threatening to tell both her father and fiancée. 

"Why is she doing this to me? She has a flock of 600,000Facebook followers to stroke her ego, not a massive amount, but enough for a wannabe crime princess."

"She is doing this because you miscalculated and didn't realise that not everybody is as good at disposing of their feelings as you are. Whatever the arrangement you may have had at the beginning. Regular mortal humans can lose their minds and judgement when sex is on the table." Eve explains without looking up from her task. 

"It is not my fault she is staring at a lifetime of Catholic conservativism and wants me to break up the monotony?" 

"Human failings exist weather you want them to or not; it's not like the days of being a servicewoman with a girl at every border, who can only see you through letters. Consequences are real, including jealous exes and heartbreak."

"Are you gearing up to tell me this is over? You need more convention in your life and fewer threats from unhinged brides to be?" 

"If that were the case, I wouldn't be letting you tend a bruise while we prepare for a movie marathon with full butter and salt. If you trust a lawyer with anything, it should be that we will tell you when things are over."

"We match." 

Oksana traces the bruise on her cheek, which is rapidly fading, but her pale skin makes things more prominent Eve smiles at the oddness of the situation. Her check stings, but somehow they still managed to communicate their way through the conflict. Her therapist would be proud of the outcome if not the situation itself. 


	7. Redemption Arc

"Be my date tomorrow night to the annual ego trip that is 'Valsilv Technology Launch?"

Eve continues to chew her popcorn thoughtfully, the plans for movie night that weekend end somewhere between generic action film one and two. Oksana is in a pensive and restless mood. Such temperament doesn't come naturally to the younger woman and is she is taking her frustration out on the inaccuracies in cinematic aviation. Eve suspects the only saving grace of the last movie is that Oksana may have a slight crush on Bree Larson in her role as Carol Danvers. Georgina Koslov's attack leaves them with matching bruises but much to think about and ponder for the future. As a divorcee in her 40s, this is something Eve could do in her sleep, but the circumstances were unique. 

"My current plans involve finishing the latest chapter of my book and packing so I think I can be convinced. You normally avoid such things wherever possible, why sign up voluntarily?" 

"To show you off, of course, plus appearing once a year stops some of the lectures."

"You want me to be your date so you can needle your ex-girlfriend without doing so directly, don't you? Prove that you are rejecting her offer 100%," Eve theorises sceptically. "Stop poking that particular hornet's nest."

Georgina Koslov is getting married this weekend (after several dramatic delays), and she insists on flooding Instagram with images and hashtags. She is sensible enough not to approach Oksana or the building directly or make any valid threats, but she is still not over the rejection. Surprisingly, Oksana doesn't feel the need to aggravate her former lover, but she does give snarky comments to Eve. 

"Not everything has a single motive Eve; I want you there because being with you makes the most boring function worthwhile, even if you wear heels like someone training on stilts." Oksana denies the claim affectionately. 

"No hashtags or couple names of any kind and we leave after the speeches." Eve bargains half-heartedly. 

"On my honour."

"The honour of a thief and a scoundrel but I'll think about it."

Oksana is doubtlessly lying about her motives and will use this night to her advantage in some way, but the prospect does sound fun. At least it will be a chance to see the beautiful woman in a pretty dress. 

***

"What is this party going to look like, and what do you need from me?"

Eve asks the questions as she wanders into the kitchen while tying her hair into a messy bun. There was every intention of extending their date night to include bedroom fun, but Oksana has early flights in the morning and doesn't want to listen to another lecture from either parent. Currently, she is munching her way through a mountain of cereal and fruit. The scene would be domestic and couple-like if it weren't for the fact that was most likely her third breakfast and Oksana broke back into Eve's house after an early morning run. 

"I need you to mingle with the guests and marvel at Vasliv technology when the scientists make their introductions, then we will be dancing, of course." Oksana shrugs dismissively before continuing. 

"It's not that different to a party at your office, except more rambling about the future and misunderstood quotes from ancient white guys. There will be halfway decent alcohol and a selection of protein, unlike your vegan temples." Her tone borders between flippant and bored. 

"That's what every sales pitch needs—an assurance of the availability of protein. Your family does have an impressive catalogue of caterers." Eve agrees while reaching for the coffee. 

"Most women don't need so much convincing to spend time with me, Eve; you are making me reach for new skills." Oksana reaches for the carton of milk and glowers playfully. 

"When it comes to seducing and persuading women, there are few skills that you don't possess in spades. I'll come along as long as your family agrees." 

"Why wouldn't they? You come to these things all the time."

"Not in this particular capacity I don't, there may be conflicts to consider." 

"We don't live in the time of Jane Austen, Eve. Nobody will be eying your land prospects."

"Of course they will."

"Fine, I'll ask then."

***

"You are making quite the statement at the party, Sana." 

Carolyn makes the statement while reviewing the last minute details for the event; she is a veteran of many formal dinners since marrying into the family but still treats everyone like a military operation. Oksana and Kenny are reluctant to foot soldiers in the war against inefficiency. This night is a particularly big deal because they are launching a new prototype and the local MP will be there along with several media groups. It wouldn't be as flashy as promising to launch billionaires into space, but it will attract attention. Several influential clients of the firm will be there and showing them a good time will help with retention rates once Britixt goes through. 

"Wow, a whole ten minutes before you start the lecture on family pride and representing my father and profession. Kenny thought you would hold out for at least the first hour of table setting; he owes me." Oksana drawls as she watches staff arrange tables and place settings. 

"I was referring to your decision to bring Eve as your date, publicly. There will be plenty of speculation, especially with the recent links to Miss Koslov." 

"I thought your whole plan was for me to take my relationship with Eve seriously and not derail your plan to make her Empress of trade law or whatever else you have going on?" Oksana asks without looking up from her phone. 

"There are ways to do that without thrusting her onto the family stage and insisting she plays this role. Eve has gone through a lot when it comes to the decisions of others; you need to be careful in making the presumption."

"You too should be delighted considering Eve enforces the law instead of my last date who gave security hives and broke about 27 statutes." Oksana points out. 

"Just be careful, ok." 

***

Eve feels ridiculous, standing in front of the mirror and judging her appearance, trying to get the dress to sit right. 

Dating in her 40s is hard work. Not in the way that  _ Sex and City  _ would have her believe, where her self-esteem lives and dies by the ageing process, more that it becomes easier to forget about the mechanics of the social niceties. Unlike when she was going on dates in her 20s, there are expectations about the future and boring details like taxes. Socialising with Niko's friends as his wife wasn't always comfortable, but it was predictable, as she went to grad school with many of them. Going out with Oksana tonight means they are a couple in public and amongst members of the younger woman's family. 

There is also no hiding the fact she is closer to Carolyn Martens' age than her dates; no amount of makeup is going to conceal that simple reality. There are plenty of lawyers on their second or third much younger wife, but there will always be a double standard for a woman. She is relatively calm about admitting her sexuality but still dreads the first comment or snide judgemental look. She and Oksana couldn't exist in a bubble of lunches and rockclimbing forever. The relationship that is building between them was going to live or die in events like this one. 

Oksana is standing on her doorstep looking charming and smug. 

Eve thinks her final choice of a simple white dress with a delicately patterned gold shawl is the right one. Her heels are barely there because she knows from experience that blisters do nobody favours. She is wearing one of the rather exotic earrings that Oksana bought for her months ago. Eve's look will contrast well with her date's choice of a vivid Cerise pink dress and sky-high heels. Oksana is practically radiating satisfaction and desire. Eve ideally wonders if the wide variety of clothing options is part of the reason Oksana loves the female form so much. 

"I take it you approve of my evening wear then? Before you ask, we are going to this event, and you aren't allowed to mess with my makeup or hair, look but don't touch." Eve says trying vainly to keep a straight face. 

"I will be counting down every second of Konstantin's boring soliloquy to innovation. Kenny can hold the flag at the after-party." Oksana insists with a petulant pout. 

"You aren't familiar with the concept of delayed gratification, are you?" Eve laughs as they head out the door. 

***

The experience of being Oksana Astankova's date at this party is surreal and fascinating. 

There is little doubt that she is here in the capacity of a date. There are few lawyers in the room, and nobody wants to talk about the finer points of trade negotiations today. Most of their clients are oohing and fawning over the technology like big boys with new shiny toys. The restaurant in the centre of the historic estate grounds is keeping people's attention as well. Konstantin spares no expense to entertain his guests. There is considerable excitement about this latest technology and its implications for the success of military operations and counterintelligence. Of course, nobody such things. Publicly it is all about the services to humanity. 

Oksana is clinging to her arm with no small amount of possessiveness and isn't shy about correcting anybody who mistakes them for colleagues or friends. Eve feels vaguely like a pize on display, but she doesn't mind that much. There is an ego boost in knowing a maverick person wants her even after such a chaotic personal life and less than an impressive job. There are a few ex-girlfriends in the room who are giving them hostile looks. The PDAs are sparing but pointed when the cameras are focusing on them. 

_ "Oksana I have access to the boat for the summer would you like me to save you a spot. We are heading to Adolfi this year." one board member offers with a charming grin.  _

_ "Can't we are visiting Eve's family in America." Oksana lies entirely without missing a beat or a charming smile.  _

_ "How did you manage to capture the attention of the exclusive Oksana?" a Korean woman who is getting progressively drunker asks far too loudly.  _

_ "Your disdain for the legal professional doesn't hold for everything than Sana?" One of her pilot friends asks with a genuine smile.  _

_ "Eve is the exception to most of my rules, Greg, says the man who married to the girl is parents were taken with from Year 10. " _ Oksana quips back. 

***

"Skulking in the corner is against the rules, Eve, come and dance with me."

Eve smiles at the slight wince in Oksana's voice as she allows the taller woman to drag her into the centre of the space. The sound system is excellent, and the music is just the right level to make dancing possible. Eve was never one to enjoy parties, but this room is large enough to make everything relatively enjoyable. She isn't sulking or skulking in the corner; she is merely observing the place and enjoying the steady supply of finger food and great wine. Its been a mini-reunion from grad school and Eve spends most the night comparing notes with a lawyer for the aviation industry. Thanks to Oksana, she has more than a passing vocabulary with the terms he uses. 

The fact Oksana is a brilliant dancer doesn't surprise Eve; the woman can do anything athletic without difficulty. They move around the dance floor without hesitation or stumbling, even as the songs changes. There are no slow songs yet, but Oksana seems to make up a rhythm that suits her. What surprises Eve is how easy it is for her to keep up, maybe all Oksana's lessons in rock climbing and physical stamina are paying off in unexpected ways. 

"So are you going to remember me when you are saving the world in Brussels?" Oksana whispers against her ear when they come to a quiet corner. 

"So you real motivations come to light, staking your claim before I head off to play real lawyer and not just Carolyn's minion?" Eve teases as they head to the bar. 

"I wasn't trying to hide my motivations in the dark or anywhere else. You made me work bloody hard for the privilege. Everybody is going to know about my success, especially as you have the most boring and predictable social media feed known to man." Oksana insists with characteristic dramatics. 

"Well by that measure you can consider the night a success. Our feet may need permanent reconstruction after that dancing, but consider your point proved. I'm blaming you if the paralegals start making jokes about my prowess as a cougar or marrying into the family." Eve replies as she flexes her ankle to ease the cramps. 

The smile Oksana gives her in return is enigmatic and hard to decipher. She would have done well in Hollywood as the sophisticated Bond Girl whose morals are hard to figure out until the end of the movie. A side effect of limited emotions is the ability to conceal them well, especially if everything is going to plan. 

***

"Stay safe, Fly Girl, there are plenty of Vegan restaurants I want covert you to yet."

"Konstantin has me doing simulations for the next month or so, nothing remotely exciting. I will be filling my days with climbing and avoiding Kenny and his gaggle of minions/friends." Oksana deflects with a sigh. 

Instead of rushing home, Eve insists that they walk around the grounds of the estate. It feels good to be in quiet contemplation outside, and the evening air is pleasant after the press of bodies and small spaces. Oksana performs admirably well when representing the company and her father, but Eve can tell that most of it is an act. She doesn't care about the planes and the work until she can get in the air and test the limits. Safety guidelines are merely challenges to be overcome. The interviewers go away happy with the perfect quotes about such a successful blended family. Even Kenny manages to avoid tripping over himself and might also have a date for the following weekend with Elena. Eve hopes so; the software developer deserves a break after trying to fit in with such a superstar family. 

At her heart, Eve will always be the proud daughter of immigrants who worked her way through law school and didn't inherit a position in a prestigious practice. The ability to freely wander such pieces of British history is still vaguely surreal. She will get Oksana to take a few shots for the Instagram feed that she finds so dull and uninspired. Her cousins back in Seoul enjoy her ability to travel so freely through Europe and always comment on the updates. 

"Be careful in all areas while I'm away, Oksana. Legal protection and your family name is little protection against committed intent. You aren't invincible." Eve cautioned while trying not to sound too much like Carolyn.

"The new Mrs Georgina Erikson will forget all about me when she starts popping out a horde of ugly Catholic babies with bad hair; everything will be fine." 

"I wasn't talking about her, try to be more discerning at the clubs or wherever else you find the latest woman to catch your eye. Some nasty synthetics is circulating in London. " Eve begins cautiously but stops reading the change in Oksana's expression. 

"I'm not an insecure lover or the veteran of too much therapy; I care about your safety in whatever form that takes, please add to the bruise collection. " Eve starts to explain 

Oksana stops suddenly and tugs on Eve's arm so that they are facing each other. There is a strange look on her face, underneath all the dramatic makeup, Eve can't seem quite to decipher what the expression means but can feel the tension in the fingers that clutch her forearm. 

"Do you honestly think you are just another entry in my phone under 'E' and easily replaceable within in a day? That I have a rotating door even after all our discussions?" 

"We've never discussed the notion of being exclusive in-depth, and you have such a low threshold for boredom. I don't have any expectations about monogamy and alike. We are still finding our way with this new arrangement. It's reasonable to think..."

"That I am repeating all my mistakes in the file that you won't read." Oksana finishes for her; the tone is flat and flinty. 

"Oksana, I'm trying to give you leniency, understanding that you are a brilliant woman in your twenties. Our time together is fantastic but not restrictive if you don't want. " Eve starts to reason in her best moderating debate tone. 

"You have no idea how much I want you, do you?" Oksana asks in genuine puzzlement. 

"I don't want this relationship to become a 'Redemption Arc where love makes the 'bad girl' a better person. I like you and don't have any decision to change your personality or preferences."

Eve gives her a searching look, but Oksana doesn't need the invitation to continue, she starts to pace in a tight circle her tailored dress moving restlessly with both the moment and the breeze. Her shoes are making little holes in the grounds that will make the custodian weep in the morning. 

"Monogamy is an old-fashioned notion with no bearing in the modern world, but so is everything I want to do with you. Carolyn spent a lifetime training me into a socially acceptable mould "Be reasonable with, Eve." She mimics the aristocratic accent almost flawlessly. 

"Ok…"

"I want to own you, possess you. I yearn to know all the boring details about your boring childhood in Michigan, and if you hadn't given in, I was this close to bribing Kenny to hack your file and put up a corkboard with illegal photos. The only thing stopping me from being on those TV shows about lovesick people is a small fortune in therapy and suitably demanding job." Oksana laughs in a strangely broken way. 

"You are the sun, my heart and soul revolves around, you give this dull world colour to me. I could sleep with a woman every hour, and they wouldn't compare to eating tasteless tofu with you.' 

Eve kisses her for fear that Oksana will run out of both oxygen and fresh ground to destroy.

"Let's focus on the reunion instead of any redemption." 


	8. Part II: A New Season

_"To those human beings who are of any concern to me I wish suffering, desolation, sickness, ill-treatment, indignities—I wish that they should not remain unfamiliar with profound self-contempt, the torture of self-mistrust, the wretchedness of the vanquished: I have no pity for them, because I wish them the only thing that can prove today whether one is worth anything or not—that one endures." _Friedrich Nietzsche, The Will to Power

The trip to Brussels is going well. 

Eve feels a sense of satisfaction when getting ready for the eighth day of talks and negotiation. Of course, the work is productive in the slow meandering pace that dominates the practice of most lawyers outside TV land. The meetings are dry and technical with constant revisions to obscure legal texts and mandates. Brexit creates many ripples in the potential fabric of European trade markets that Martin Legal Services is one of many groups in high demand. Eve enjoys the challenges of putting together the puzzle pieces. Carolyn is thinking of extending her trip for the networking opportunities alone. Their clients will not bat an eye at the extra charges. 

_"We need to talk about your next professional move, Eve. You have a bright future in this field should you want it. However hiding away from your divorce isn't an option anymore." _Carolyn comments in their last conversation. 

Eve feels both gratification and pressure, knowing that her divorce is finally complete and that she and Niko won't be playing the dance of denial any more. Carolyn and the mountain of work in the Brexit Landscape did prevent her from having to make hard professional decisions. Without conscious thought, Oksana is becoming a factor in her considerations even if they haven't said such words out loud. Eve wants to use the time away to gain a sense of perspective before moving out of the weekly date cycle. 

Oksana likes to punctuate her professional day with random photos and almost reflective offers for phone sex. 

**Photo 1: **A random set of cat's paws as a strange token of good luck 

**Photo 2: **The view from the top of her favourite rock climbing wall. 

**Phone 3: ** A possibly illegal shot of her plane dashboard with a photo of Eve taped in the corner. 

**Photo 4: **A selfie of Oksana in front of Walter's cafe in an impossibly bright outfit. 

There are practicalities when considering dating Oksana in a serious way and with an eye towards the future. Oksana will be taking up regular flying duties again soon, and Konstantin has plenty of new techs for her to defy gravity with, now that the tests are complete. Eve married a teacher for a reason. Her expectation of life did not include a rollercoaster of adrenaline and fear every few months. The necessity of developing a relationship with her boss outside work is a daunting prospect, especially when Carolyn and Oksana lock horns. 

Strangely enough, all the articles and scandal about age gap love tend to focus on the big things like birth, death and finances. Few commentators examine what comes after initial shock and awe tactics. Most people in their respective lives know they see each other (if not the specifics) but do they need to look at milestones like double-dating?

Maybe she can have a conversation with Oksana from the passenger seat of her beloved 'starter plane.’ Incidentally, Eve never thought she would be with anyone who routinely needed descriptions like 'starter plane.' At least Oksana doesn't feel the need to wear a leather jacket to the vegan restaurant anymore, to be contrarian. 

Eve should find the notion of going out in a little plane, barely bigger than a tin can, terrifying. Still, the idea of making Oksana happy and finally shutting her about the 'mile high club' would almost be with the aggravation and sleepless nights that would proceed it. 

***

In hindsight, Eve will blame wider trends in historical European architecture. 

These negotiations involve long days and even longer nights. Unlike many conferences, there is no built-in social time or sightseeing. The closest Eve comes to such feat is a walk around the main city taking photos for Oksana while she decompresses for the day. The only real compensation the EU delegation can offer is access to one of the best hotel/conference venues in the city, the kind that almost becomes a tourist attraction. There might also be a not so subtle effort to remind the British what they are missing. As an ex-pat of three countries, six times zones and more cities than she can remember, Eve is grateful for the soft bed and plentiful food. 

Grand staircases in historical buildings have their place but not when she is running late and are struggling to adjust to the new shoes her mom brought her for Christmas. Eve flies down the stairs like a graduate late for a dissertation defence. The wood and glass are beautiful and arresting as a statement piece but not overly practical for the unwary traveller. The hotel reels in horror that an actual legion of lawyers are witnesses and offer generous compensation. However, this isn't America, and Eve doesn't blame then entirely. 

Eve loses her balance and briefcase simultaneously. It's the latter that she worries about first without realising the danger. Falling eight stairs may not seem like a big deal, but the distance doesn't matter if she can't protect herself. Unlike the laptop, there is no immediate protection for her body. Plenty of people are around and willing to help, but she slides and falls too fast for anyone to stop the forward moment. It's almost like she was living out one of those problems from high school physics class. 

"Eve, stay down. You took a nasty fall, the hotel is calling an ambulance." The worried tone of one of her research assistants is still comforting. 

Normally, Eve would protest being such a spectacle, but her body is in considerable amounts of pain already, and she hasn't tried to move yet. The small consolation is that she can immediately use all her limbs and get feedback from each joint. Her back may be on fire, but her spine is safe for now. 

"Can you handle the meetings for me." Eve gasps out, talking on a shallow breath. 

"You are keeping me briefed until I can recite everything in my sleep. The flag of Martens Legal services will fly proudly without you. Stay still and focus on breathing. I can see the ambulance staff running across the lobby." Elena is crouching at her side, trying to her voice light. 

"Broken ribs and at least some nerve damage in my back." Eve predicts with a level of clinical detachment that is a most likely shock. 

"What are you a doctor to know? On top a legal superstar and Carolyn's heir apparent?" Elena tries to joke, but her voice is taut with tension. 

"No, just something of an expert at falling nowadays. Don't let my mum catch the red-eye over here. She'll work herself into an absolute state in three languages." Eve whispers imploringly, rapidly losing the ability to focus. 

"You got it, Boss. Do you want your pilot to come swooning over here like a female Richard Gere?" Elena asks, gesturing to the paramedics as they pound up the stairs. 

Eve doesn't have the energy to point out that Oksana Astankova Vasiliev would make a terrible casting for _An Officer and A Gentleman. _She is focusing on not screaming when they inch her onto the backboard and secure her neck. 

***

Her injuries are a wonder of unfortunate events and inescapable physics. 

Strangely, Eve credits Oksana and her obsession with learning to rock climb and understand her body for managing not to lose control completely. The distinction mattered immediately, but the difference in how she fell will affect her prospects for recovery and overall mobility. Somewhere, Oksana's voice instructs Eve to protect her spine and head. In practice, there isn't allot much to do, but her reflexes are getting better with the regular exercise. The encouragement of her brash and egotistical young lover probably helps matters too. 

"You won't feel like it now or for some time to come, but you are a lucky woman, that fall could have done allot more damage." The doctor says in an almost cherry tone. 

The treatment cycle is a blur of tests and doctors asking questions and giving instructions. Eve loses consciousness under sedation and wakes up in considerably less pain but a haze of drugs and fatigue. Various parts of Eve's body are carefully wrapped and cushioned to minimise movement. She is on low doses of oxygen while they monitor her lung function. The whole thing is an advertisement for workplace safety, which is hilarious given her job. 

Her back is a wreck of bruises and vertebrate tissues. Thankfully the spinal cord itself didn't suffer trauma beyond the nerve pain. There is no need at this stage to operate to relieve pressure or stabilise anything. Several specialists are going to review the file at the request of the hotel. Her back will be the slowest to heal, and the injury to most likely have long term outcomes. 

Three of her ribs have fractures to varying degrees. The pain stabs her every time she breathes, but they will heal on their own eventually. For at least the next week or ten days, Eve will need to adjust her routine and sleep patterns to avoid aggravating the sore spots. The plane trip back is going to be an interesting experience and not just because it requires her to move and use her limbs. 

***

The most painful diagnosis is also accidental and happens 24 hours.

As part of the routine full-body scan in the emergency room, doctors discover and then investigate further, damage to her fallopian tubes and uterus, aside from bruising connected to the fall. The two things are not related, but Eve still feels the sting of knowing that her abstract dream is over before it even began. Such an occurrence was always a possibility with her medical history and the troubles in the past. There is a difference between knowing for sure and fearing the prospect in the abstract. 

"I am sorry that we need to deliver such news on top of your injuries. The damage is in the acute phase, and we would need your permission to investigate for further complications. The odds of this being anything of concern to your overall health are small. If given the opportunity, we like to rule out additional health complications when somebody is in recovery mode."

"Don't worry about it, I understand. We went through most of the potential options when the problems first came up. It's not like I was hanging all my hopes on babies in my 40s. Even though it’s quite the trend now." Eve tries to sound stoic, but there is a catch in her throat. 

"What you like to speak to somebody from Gynaecology when you return to Britain? I am happy to liaise with your General Practitioner. Your immediate recovery is the priority here but this flare up shouldn't ignored." The doctor sounds genuinely concerned for her. 

Eve's first instinct is to be scornful and point out how little difference talk therapy will make when her body is failing her. However, she went through the fertility angst years ago, and the pain is more distant when there are broken bones. It turns out her womb was as inhospitable as her marriage at the time. There is a technical name for such things now, how much that matters is still matter for debate. 

"Give me the contact details. It can't hurt to get confirmation when there aren't whales floating on the ceiling."

The doctor smiles and nods before leaving the room quietly. Eve knows she shouldn't try to think clearly with so many painkillers onboard. She cannot help replaying all the conversations with Niko and deciding to keep the eggs frozen. Was all that aggravation without it in the end, if kids weren't going to be a practical reality?

If her back is anything to go by Eve went straight from mother to ancient crone with none of the fun bits in between. 

***

"Is there anybody you would like us to call for you? There was nobody on your next of kin list during intake." 

It takes Eve a moment to remember that she did a professional level job untangling Niko from all her paperwork, including emergency documents. Finding a suitable replacement fell down the list of priorities when other things were competing for her time and energy. Sadly, the person she spends the most time with (and thus could make a decision at short notice) is Carolyn, but somehow that feels like a pathetic thing to ask your boss. Her closest relatives are still either in the States or Korea. 

Even though they have done such work on separating legally and emotionally, Eve's first instinct is still to ask for Niko. If anybody can make her laugh between bouts of morphine and boredom, it would be him. He would come into the room with an endless supply of stories and games. She can almost feel his heavy hand and smell the aftershave she brought him every few months. Eve doesn't have the right to be that selfish, especially when the issue of those stupid embryos will come up again. 

"I don't suppose you will let me work from a reclining position and thus let my assistant in? if I promise not to move more than 1 centimetre at a time?" Eve suggests trying to look the doctor in the eye with confidence. 

"Even if I were to entertain such a notion, you are riding the crest of some top-shelf pain relievers right now but that won't last forever. Your vertebrae and ribs are going to make themselves known, that's if exhaustion doesn't claim you first. With a hospital this close to EU Headquarters’, you aren't the first high flyer lawyer to ask." The doctor advises promptly with absolute conviction. 

"Call Carolyn Martens at Martens Legal Services. She'll help me figure everything out. Your nurses can stop feeling sorry for me as the stranded woman with no friends or family. Travel between Britain and mainland Europe isn't on the rest list yet." 

As if on a schedule, Eve can feel her eyes start to droop and all her intentions of staying awake to discuss her future go out the window. She is characteristically a restless sleeper, but her body stays carefully wrapped and positioned. She can't easily move even if she could summon the energy to lift her hand. Her last thought is that Oksana will be itching to do something with her matted hair mess and she will never wear heels again. She can almost hear the teasing and fussing as she waits for the next steps. 

***

"Eve has been in an accident at work. She is ok but things look serious." 

Oksana stares at her stepmother in disbelief for several long minutes. The words are perfectly rational, but she can't make them fit together in the proper order. Her phone is full of texts and pictures from the woman in question saying that the trip is going well and there is an impressive amount of vegan options available. 

"What the hell is an 'accident at work’? She is a lawyer working on trade negotiations with the EU, not the Hague. A glorified pencil pusher has an accident at work?" Oksana blinks in disbelief. 

"And somebody who breaks the sound barrier on a weekly basis is perfectly safe. Life takes many cruel twists. I suggest you arrange the next flight over. She won't be moving for a while." Carolyn instructs briskly, already turning away from the door. 

Oksana feels an unfamiliar range of emotions when she imagines Eve lying in the hospital room in all kinds of pain and most likely stressing about work. There were specific end goals when she made a play for her stepmother's favourite employee. Developing genuine feelings and something close to a relationship with _communication _is still a new experience. Oksana probably needs to give that endless stream of childhood shrinks credit for determining that she is human even if she doesn't process situations the same way. 

"When you get there, please try to reassure Eve that the entire EU Trade Delegation won't collapse without her in immediate attendance. We have been preparing for this talks for months, the actual meetings are akin to window dressing." Carolyn keeps up a running commentary as they move through the hallways. 

"However will I prove more entertaining to a repressed lesbian in her 40s than lectures on grain prices in Lithuania?" Oksana muses condescendingly. 

"The training wheels are about to come of this relationship dynamic you wanted so much, Sana. There is a reason Eve was so hesitant to entertain anything beyond a passing fancy. The reality isn't nearly as glamorous beyond expensive jewellery and rock climbing dates. Your father's injury in '96 almost undid our years of careful parenting and family blending." Carolyn warns, opting as always for the blunt approach with her stepdaughter. 

"Stop going all 'motherly' on me, Carolyn. You are ruining our patented mix of snark and judgement. For the last time, I understand that Eve is different, not a shiny toy I give back to you in poor condition." Oksana insists, wanting to hurry past this family bonding moment quickly. 

"I'm going to be whoever you need, Oksana. Sarcasm and mockery is merely the language you are most familiar with. Konstantin learnt how to speak to Kenny using deductive logic arguments. Your flight to Brussel leaves in 30 minutes." Carolyn pulls her into a fierce but expected hug. 

Oksana bounds on her heels, trying not to imagine how badly Eve failed to defy gravity. This moment is one of the few her job is a drawback, Oksana knows precisely how bodies can break and bend. 


	9. Landings Angles I

_"I'm not in search of sanctity, sacredness, purity; these things are found after this life, not in this life; but in this life I search to be completely human: to feel, to give, to take, to laugh, to get lost, to be found, to dance, to love and to lust, to be so human." _

_― C. JoyBell C._

"Falling down the stairs is such a pathetic way to almost die, Eve." 

"You know its customary not to insult someone while holding vigil at their hospital bed."

Eve is mildly impressed with her quip. The haze of painkillers is slowing wearing off for the morning. She still has persistent drowsiness, but it's worth the trade-off to avoid the mix of nerve pain and deep bruising. Time continues to do strange things, but Eve is relatively certain that it is less than 36 hours since her accident. Most lawyers at her level have a fairly accurate internal clock if only for billing purposes. Oksana's presence is both a relief and something of a surprise.

It takes Eve a second to focus, but Oksana looks bright and more than a little ridiculous in her neon lime shirt and pink combat boots. It's enough to keep even Eve's hazy and wandering attention. Part of Eve wonders if Carolyn sent her stepdaughter on a mercy dash or the younger woman is here on her own. She looks beautiful and amusing in whatever she chooses to wear. 

"Carolyn send you to check on me?" Eve whispers, trying not to move and aggravate things. 

"And undersold your spectacular physics fail. Were you trying to antagonise every joint and limb or were you lucky this one time?" Oksana asks gesturing vaguely towards the entirety of the bed. 

"Didn't mean to frighten anyone. The doctors say no permanent damage, but I'll be feeling the insult for a while. My nerves are a mess of inflammation but I'm out of the woods for the worst complications." 

"Save the party line for Stepmother Dearest or one of your minions. You are a seriously terrible liar. If talking makes you wince and sweat this much stop doing it. This quivering isn't the kind of pain kink I'm into, Eve."

"Talking bad, but thinking is worse. Is everything ok at the office? Did Carolyn give you any specific instructions for me?" 

"I have spent around 15 years deliberately trying to avoid listening to anything that woman says, especially when it comes to her work. Nothing was interesting after 'Eve somehow lost a battle with some stairs in the hotel.’" Oksana tries to sound entirely flippant but doesn't quite succeed. 

"You are a fairly unreliable narrator in any event. I'll ask Jess or Elena in the morning. Thanks for coming and feel free to raid the supplies of mystery desserts." Eve instructs as she feels herself losing battle with fatigue. 

"Britain will still be hurtling towards a No Deal chaotic nightmare without you there to oversee the paperwork, Eve. Did you get into all this trouble by tripping over your ego, glorified pencil pusher?" Oksana whispers the anachronistic insult with a hint of emotion that Eve is too tired to try and name. 

***

"They need to give you better medication, you aren't pulling off the stoic martyr thing well." 

Eve is in too much pain to point out that she isn't trying for any form of stoicism. The medical team did warn her that flare-ups were inevitable, especially when she runs a low-grade fever. She is going to miss her return flight to Britain because the doctors don't want her to run the risk. Oksana doesn't say a word about the change in plans, merely smuggles in more contraband food and travel bedding from an army buddy. 

"Wasn't going for the hero complex, just trying to figure out how to breathe at regular intervals." 

Before Oksana can reply, one of the nurses comes into the room to divert their attention. Eve summons the energy to answer the questions and measuring on the pain scale. Naturally, Oksana has a greater flair for the dramatic and demands an audience with her surgeon. It's almost amusing in the hazy moments when Eve focus. 

_"Eve is struggling get her something for the pain now, you idiots." _ _Oksana decides that insulting people in their native language is more effective. _

_"Ma'am she is on a strict regime of medication..."_

_"Well the regime can go to hell." _

Eve feels sorry for the nurse and the poor junior who is stuck dutifully translating for her at the other side of the bed. Oksana Astankova is a lot to handle at the best of times, but from the confines of the hospital, her attitude ramps up tenfold. The insult about the country and the quality of the chocolate is probably going a little far. 

"Guys can barely process the languages I do speak, much less Dutch. Oksana, they are doing the best they can. It's not his fault my circuits are misfiring at a rapid rate." Eve reaches out a clammy hand for Oksana's in a vaguely soothing motion. 

"I will talk to the doctor and review your medication." The nurse offers a compromise. 

Oksana is the definition of a vain and deeply arrogant snob, but she perches on that hospital bed, holding Eve's sweaty hand until she falls asleep again. To the best of Eve's knowledge, she doesn't create any diplomatic incidents either, which is always a bonus. 

***

"Do you want to see a running total of my scars and the stories behind them?"

"That would be an interesting Oksana Astankova version of a bed time story." 

Eve tries to muster a smile, but the pain is getting to her even in the luxury of Konstantin's private plane. Oksana flatly refused to let her leave the hospital and get on a commercial airline. Eve is uncomfortable with the expense, but her back and leg are grateful for the perks of dating an aviation heiress. The flight is mercifully short, but the movement is still draining. 

Oksana is her usual energetic and erratic self and Eve finds the tendency both exhausting and endearing in equal measure. She supposes it says something about their relationship that the younger woman decides to stick around during the transfer—however, it’s too exhausting to consider such emotional things right now. 

"I can tell the best stories before bedtime. It would be much better though if you were fully conscious to appreciate them. Why aren't you taking the sleeping pill again?"

"I don't want to get to too drowsy before the appointment at the hospital." Eve replies firmly. 

"Now is not the time to go for the butch tough girl look or to channel my stepmother. You have at least 8 appointments in the next two weeks alone." Oksana insists, holding out the pills. 

"Those are certainly some strange metaphors you have going on there. I'm surprised you aren't offering me anything from a private stash, Fly Girl." Eve quips.

"Not on a fully charted plane with Konstantin’s favourite crew on board. They are annoyingly immune to my form of blackmail and bribery. I'm all yours when we are on the ground. Alternative forms of pain relief are a speciality." 

Oksana flirts like other people, absorb sunlight or perform other necessary functions. Eve takes comfort in the idea that she must not look too hideous if Oksana has gone back to her reflexive pickup lines. It would be better if she could summon the energy to do more than smile indulgently. Maybe a touch of Oksana's vanity is having an impact on her, but at least Eve has something more pleasant to focus on the pain. 

"Ask me again when we hit turbulence or I try and move into the car. I'll be open to any offers there." 

***

"Want to come and watch me workout and pretend you don't have a mild kink about gym bodies?" 

The simple statement is the reason that Eve chose Oksana to go with her to the appointment with her GP rather than her friends. Everybody else was too _sad _about the fact she definitely can't have the children she isn't sure that she wanted in the first place. Such a topic isn't difficult for most people to process, and Oksana's casual hits the right mark now. She doesn't even want to come into the room, preferring to wait outside reading out-of-date magazines. 

"I don't have a gym kink, you egomaniac." 

Eve is surprised she can still bark out a laugh after listening to the sober news from the doctor. She feels almost bad taking up his valuable time when she was ambivalent about having children anyway. Still, the stark medical reality is far from fun, especially when there is no one there to share the load. Fortunately, the damage will not be the start of more medical complications, but it is still a concern with her current pain levels. 

"Hey, I'm not about to kink shame, Eve. We all have our measures of desires. It's a good sign after your medication cocktail." Oksana says.

Surprisingly, Eve does want to talk about her mangled mix of emotions, but doing so feels too daunting right now. Oksana is one of the few people on the planet who won't get soft calf eyes when Eve talks about the diagnosis. Perhaps watching her younger lover get sweaty for a while will help her think more clearly. 

"I can't promise not to fall asleep but I'm all in favour of being anywhere that lets me sit down and ease out the cramp in my leg." Eve agrees patiently. 

"and plenty of opportunities to express the sapphic desires you repressed for longer than I've been alive?" Oksana encourages with a bounce in her step. 

***

"Come on Eve, you need to eat." 

Predictably Oksana does not take to the role of caretaker with ease. Eve doesn't expect such behaviour from her lover. Their relationship is strange and unusual, but there aren't that many moments of tenderness. The truth is she doesn't want Oksana to change into the doting mother hen type. The transformation would be too dramatic, and Stepford Wives don’t bring any comfort. The fact they are spending time together in Eve's house between appointments is enough for now. Eve's fickle appetite is a bone of contention between them. 

"Where are we going and why can't we have date night at home on the coach?" 

Eve tries not to sound too whiny, but the hours after 4 pm are never her best. The daytime meds are no longer as effective, and her body insists on reminding her that there is a reason she still takes pills twice a day. Carolyn pays for a ridiculously expensive office chair for her, but her back is still a mess of pain receptors before too long. She is not back at work in any meaningful sense, but Carolyn needs her to put out several fires stemming from the trip. The team is competent without her, but Eve was the lead negotiator for a reason. Truthfully it's a toss-up between boredom and pain being the most aggravating feature of this whole experience. 

"Because you are using your embarrassing and pathetic injury as an excuse to stay on that couch all day. Emotional investment in that much K-Drama is not healthy for anyone, least of all somebody who uses ten syllable words for fun. Besides, you owe me real food. Stealing food from your hospital tray does not count." Oksana explains no bothering to slow her pace. 

"You have at least 4 food delivery apps on your phone. I don't object to feeding you, it's the excessive amount of movement that is causing me trouble." Eve says, hobbling along, trying not to lean too much on the cane. 

"It's not that much further, Miss Grumpy. Walter padded a chair especially for you and has all your Vegan favourites on the menu ready to go. It was going to be a surprise but somebody needed more convincing." 

Eve blinks in surprise when she realises they are indeed outside her favourite place to eat. Complete with the familiar lighting and sign, with “Welcome Eve." on it. The gesture makes her swoon in the best way. 

***

"Come on its just a boring family dinner, it'll be perfect for testing out those shaking legs of yours." 

"Family dinner takes on a whole new meaning when the meal in question has my boss and her billionaire husband at the table. There was a reason I did that elaborate list about why we couldn't date, it wasn't for fun, you know." Eve disagrees, fretting in from of the mirror. 

"You did seem to get off on the misery angle for months if the gossip in HR is anything to go by. If it’s any consolation I'm pretty sure Daddy Dearest bribed whoever made that list." Oksana disagrees, tapping her foot impatiently. 

"I look like a scarecrow with aspirations towards acting, are you sure you want me on your arm tonight, I'm sure there are plenty of models waiting for your Instagram message. I'll give you a free pass, even?" Eve jokes while being half-serious. 

"That would be an insult to scarecrows if you don't finish putting on that makeup. Besides it would have been easier to dump you when you were still on the drip and drooling an impressive amount, this display is mundane in comparison. Give me that." Oksana banters back without much sympathy. 

Eve reluctantly hands over her makeup brush, squirming to try and stay comfortable. She tries not to feel too suspicious as she watches Oksana approach, spinning her chair around so that she can get a full view of the wreckage. If anybody is an expert with different forms of makeup, it's her companion for the evening. Still, there is something strangely intimate about letting someone else take over beautification. Oksana's movements are surprisingly gentle and efficient as she traces over different features. 

"You need to invest in a better foundation. Your skin is going through its version of a drought." Oksana whispers. Her eyes are looking impossibly large at this distance. 

"I'll let you take me shopping sometime next week." Eve offers without thinking. 

"A dangerous prospect indeed." 

Eve finds herself smiling at how seriously Oksana is taking the task of applying makeup and getting the blend to look natural. It's a fool's errand eradicating the signs of her sleepless nights and pain. Her lover seems determined to try at any cost. The movement feels vaguely like butterfly wings on her skin. 

***

"What are you going to do with the embryos in storage?" 

Eve knew that this conversation was coming in general and that tonight was as logical as any. The 'family dinner.' went well insomuch as she still has a job and nobody comments on the relationship. Carolyn gives them suspicious looks occasionally, but that's nothing new. Eve considers it a victory when she manages to sample everything without throwing up. Her lack of appetite is still more hit than miss, but she isn't continuing to lose weight. Her jokes about middle-age spread only make Oksana glower harder. 

"You shouldn't ask that when I am expressly forbidden from using alcohol."

Eve looks at her companion with mock indignation. They are lying together in what could be a nest of blankets and soft foam cushions. The rock climbing gym looks eery at night, but the mats are surprisingly comfortable and supportive if Eve lies the right away. Oksana went through some trouble to make a suitable place for this version of a heart to heart. Eve could easily fall asleep here against this wedge cushion staring at the gym ceiling. Of course, Oksana had to bring up the most troublesome topic just as she is starting to feel at ease. 

"It wouldn't make any difference. You don't use alcohol as a coping mechanism or at least not in a major way. Self-recrimination and denial are more the styles of the day." 

"You wouldn't be saying that if you saw me in the first few years of colleague and law school. Weekend indulgences were practically mandatory for a while, until we realised the value of reciting case law without a raging hangover." Eve disagrees, wincing at the memories. 

"Answer the question, Eve, it'll give you a better chance of sleeping tonight if you've talked about the 'monster under the bed'." Oksana encourages with a surprising lack of hostility or sarcasm. 

"Your question implies that there is an easy answer to give. The storage fees need renewing for another few months. I'll decide by than or at least put the charge through my monthly expenses. There are all sorts of flyers on Embryo Donation, Embryo Retrieval, Embryo Disposal. In my morphine state I'll be dreaming of such things before too long." Eve explains without looking at the younger woman. 

"Is the market high for Korean-Polish embryos?" Oksana wonders out loud

Eve cannot help falling into a helpless laugh even as her ribs started to protest. Oksana was as serious about the question as she was capable of being. However, there is something bleakly humorous about assessing the demand for a baby with her and Niko's distinctive features. How would her gangly proportions work with that strong jawline and cheekbones? Maybe it was a mystery best left in the abstract. 

"Can I make a suggestion?" Oksana asks without looking away from the ceiling. 

"If you are about to suggest that you become a surrogate or something like those stupid movies, I may force you to come into counselling with me." Eve warns she intrigued despite herself. 

"Don't be foolish, Eve. There is no way I would pass the psychological evaluation. Children are far too numerous and overrated in my opinion. There is no way I am giving up nine months of flying time for the sake of what is essentially a lovable, faintly adorable, parasite with excellent PR." Oksana insists looking vaguely ill at the thought. 

"What's your idea then?" 

Eve asks the question with a mixture dread and intrigue. Oksana is smiling like she holds the secret to world peace or at least blackmailing it’s most problematic leaders, which knowing her isn’t out of the question.


	10. Decision Tree 101

_"Courage doesn't happen when you have all the answers. It happens when you are ready to face the questions you have been avoiding your whole life." _

_― Shannon L. Alder_

"You would have flunked out of flight school, two minutes after the first intake." 

Eve blinks in surprise at the turn in the conversation. Oksana seems uncharacteristically serious during this talk. She is attentive to Eve's needs and the magnitude of her physical and psychological trauma, even if she struggles to relate to the particulars. Oksana has always haunted the halls of Martens Legal Services as infrequent enigma. An intimate relationship doesn't mean her lover understands her entirely. For one very few women under the age of 30 would want to discuss the implications of infertility with anyone, much less somebody out of a messy separation. 

"I don't think that was ever in question, even if my less than perfect night vision didn't do that for me already." Eve points out dryly.

"Aviation, especially the experimental kind, is a long series of decisions from flight paths, risk factors, pilot health, machine finesses. Konstantin spent years drilling me on every little detail. I'm not much of a protegee, but he doesn't have the temperament for teaching anyone." Oksana begins explaining, making sweeping hand gestures. 

Eve nods slowly, waiting for the situation to make sense. 

"All the preparation is a useless waste of energy and sometimes fatal if you don't make a decision one way or the other. I cannot keep a million-pound technology in the sky because two or three flight paths look equally good. Not only would that stall the mission, but all the previous work that went into the planning would go to waste and leave a dent in the profits and payroll. You are doing the same on a smaller scale with your life, waiting for a perfect set of coordinates that simply will not exist." Oksana explains, getting earnest now. 

"I'm pretty sure leaving my perfectly-stable decent husband who my family adores counts as decisive action. There were enough meetings and arguments about it to classify such things. Most of my family is still waiting for me to come to my senses. How is that existing in a holding pattern and burning 'emotional fuel.'?” Eve puts the last part in childish air quotes. 

"It's the same thing if you are still shadowboxing with three or four versions of the potential 'Life of Eve.’ The whole multiverse thing only exists in a series of increasingly bad American Sci-Fi. You need to pick your runway, not circle waiting for a flight path of divine intervention." Oksana says with absolute confidence and authority. 

"I almost feel short-changed. My back, leg and nervous system are reeling from the effects but my fall into comes with a whole series of life-affirming revelations. Unless I count taking advice from you, Fly Girl, and your best Carol Danvers impression." Eve points out with a sad smile. 

"You wouldn't be the only woman in the past to find my words life-affirming, Eve. Georgina got into so much pathetic trouble because she wouldn't listen." Oksana says with a confidant egotistical grin. 

****

Eve is reluctant to concede that Oksana has a point. 

Her metaphor about fighter pilots and the costs of their decisions has flaws. For one thing, mere mortals fight with insecurity and doubts daily. The type of people that become experimental pilots or astronauts are the same human beings that can work under the extreme pressure and astronomical sums of money in play. Eve suspects that both she and Oksana have done psychological evaluations in their time with markedly different results. However, the principle of what she is saying remains sound. Eventually, the decision is going to be out of her hands. Eve may as well wrestle as much control as possible. 

"Niko and I have finished all the paperwork, Mom. There is no hope for reconciliation or a second honeymoon. Things are better this way; we were not making each other happy in the end. He is still young enough to find somebody who can meet his needs better. Like Dad did when he married you." Eve explains, trying to maintain an even temper and tone. 

"Who will look after you? That accident at work sounds terrifying." her mother’s frets sound genuinely heartsick. 

Eve doesn't exactly want to say that the closest thing to a caretaker is her much younger lesbian lover who may or may not be a sociopath. Her parents are more liberal than many of their peers, especially when it comes to controlling a daughter, but there are limits to such things. Eve feels they strike a decent balance in connecting when an ocean or continent is separating them for 345 days of the year. It's why Eve didn't let her mother fly over to Britain after the accident despite many protests. There is no need to add family drama to the mix. 

"I am looking after myself just fine, Ma. Caroline and the team are taking excellent care of me during the work hours, and the NHS is treating its wayward daughter well. I'll be fit enough to be on the plane to see you guys in a few months just like we planned."

"Your father saw that article in the paper about the negotiations stalling for the second time. Will Caroline Martens want you to go back to work and fix the mess at the table?" The tone is fretful. 

“Me and several 100 other lawyers, Mom.”

***

Eve's desire to change her life is a fickle and ever twisting thing. 

There is definite scope for plenty of career advancement and better pay brackets but more time at the office isn't an appealing prospect. The restrictions of having a body that is still recovering are doing her mental health a world of good. Both her parents were immigrant cliches, working too many hours for little reward and plenty of racist scorn, even though her father spoke better English than most of his colleagues put together. Work-Life balance is a fantasy of pop psychology, but Eve wants something more. 

Her body is responding well to the therapy and home exercise programme. Pain is her constant companion most days and particularly vicious at night. There are plenty of explanations about pain management theory and protocol, but none of that matters at 2 am when Eve's back is on fire. She needs the medication for far longer than the lawyer in her is comfortable with but it’s a necessary evil. Plenty of her colleagues are nursing full-scale addictions to different substances. Eve is working reduced hours, and the assistants at Martens are working hard to keep her caseload at a manageable level. 

"Why did you become a lawyer in the first place and how did Stepmother Dearest convince you to join her boring branch of the profession?" Oksana asks without a trace of self-consciousness over lunch in the office. 

"Law is a brilliant mixture of puzzle, argument and negotiation. My answers aren't any more romantic than such skills matching my interests and my parents' expectations for the second generation. Your stepmother is an excellent negotiation with a generous benefits package than I am availing myself of right now.

"She doesn't like children overly much, in case that factors into your decision. It's hardly surprising with a disappointment like Kenny as a son, whatever random collection of recessive genes produced him."

***

The biological inability to have a child is not the most painful aspect of her healing for Eve. 

Eve spends far too much time googling the effects of her particular type of inflammation and autoimmune irregularities. Her health is one area where she wishes she didn't have such spectacular research stills. It takes no time to find and devour the most up-to-date studies and findings. Treatments haven't progressed much in the intervening years since her first diagnosis, and it is more of a managing symptoms situation than looking for a cure. At least she doesn't have the huge hurting desire to have a child later in life on top of the symptoms. The pain and mood swings are enough. It isn't much of a surprise to find out that there are issues for women in her mother's family that weren't talked about openly. 

Eve is surprised when she manages to convince Oksana to join her vegan cooking class. 

To be more precise, Eve manages to convince Oksana to spend Friday evenings sampling the fruits of her labour. Walter is branching out and teaching home versions of his most popular and tasty meals. Six of his most loyal customers pay reasonable rates to learn a series of main meals and desserts. Nobody complains too loudly when Oksana becomes their unofficial food critic, even if her humour is somewhat caustic. 

"You know that the lifestyle gurus are making a fortune convincing people that eating 30 shades of green will cure whatever sickens them, right. Chickpeas are not magic." Oksana points out while eagerly tucking into the burger. 

"Give me the illusion of control, Flygirl. I feel better for the dietary changes, and it settles my stomach with all the medication." Eve insists as she wipes down the benchtop. 

"Fair enough. I'm still giving you real ice cream in the weekend."

***

Eve doesn't want souvenirs of her marriage to Niko in the traditional sense of the term. The embryos are, in an abstract sense, the ultimate lingering legacy.

Eve is on the way out from her latest physio session (with glowing marks from the torturer-in-chief) when she sees a familiar profile across the street. She will recognise that particular gait and laugh for the rest of her life, even across a busy street in the middle of London. It takes Eve a moment to remember that they are only a few blocks from Niko's second favourite bridge club. His routine is as predictable as always right down to the shoes and shirt he is wearing. Eve brought that particular pair several Christmases ago. 

Niko is not alone, which also isn't a surprise for the social butterfly. Eve watches with a mixture of emotions as her former husband leads a younger woman through the streets. He looks so happy and beaming. Her former in-laws are shuffling along behind them, smiling indulgently. While Eve will always feel sad that her marriage didn't work out, she is glad for the outcome. 

Niko would have flown to Brussel like a misguided knight in shining armour, and that would have been a mistake. Eve quickly ducks away to ensure that no one will see her. London is just multicultural enough that she can blend in, even with her wild hair. Eve feels tears streaming, but they are more happy than sad. If the Polastri parents are already in the picture then it must be serious. At the same time as her physical wounds heal the ghosts of the past as no longer so painful. 

_"If you can't be happy with me or our relationship, please promise me something?" Niko asks gently after the final meeting. _

_"Yes of course." Eve whispers in equal tone. _

_"Find somebody to take care of you. Don't work yourself into the ground. I can't help but worry about you, Eve." _

There will come a time when Niko doesn't even remember such a declaration. He will find a girlfriend or future wife who will make the pain of the many arguments fade into the background. Eve still resolves to keep the promise to him and live a better and healthy life when her back stops protesting every movement. Oksana both in principle and person would horrify Niko and his conservative parents, but she could be right kind of caretaker for Eve at this moment. 

***

Eve doesn't have a burning desire to rectify her infertility. 

Strangely enough, the realisation comes to her when she is helping a pair of children out of an energy situation. Caroline's somewhat estranged daughter is going through a contentious custody battle with her second husband, who was no better than the first. Eve takes on babysitting duty by being a calm person who doesn't have an overflowing caseload right now. Carolyn is trying to act as both ruthless legal advisor and distant mother to her daughter, which is never a good conversation. Fortunately, they are having the meeting at the far end of the building. Eve's boss is a formidable grandmother and leaves firm instructions. 

The children are unnaturally quiet and make few demands on Eve's time. She suspects they have spent far too much time following their mother to legal offices. The youngest boy seems to have an interest in art and is doodling on one of Eve's legal pads. He is using her good pens and highlighters, but it feels like a small sacrifice for peace and contentment. The older boy is picking listlessly at the remains of a sandwich. 

"Your grandmother will help resolve this, boys. Sometimes grownups need help to figure out the way forward. Is there anything I can get for you?" Eve asks softly, not wanting to break the spell. 

"Dad doesn't want us, he just wants to make Mummy pay for leaving us. Grandma doesn't even remember our birthdays with the app that Uncle Kenny made. She doesn't want to lose either." the boy replies gloomily. 

"New plan. Sometimes adults suck beyond all reason. It's unfair that you get caught in the middle without any power to make any difference in the outcome. Do you want me to call Oksana and get her to bring tons of games and junk food? She has some pretty awesome tech and prototypes."

The boys nodded with limited enthusiasm, and Eve wonders how much sugar bribery accompanies these meetings. Oksana's reputation as the provider of wild fun and unusual combinations may be the selling point. Ushering the children out the door makes Eve realise that having children should never be an ambivalent decision, not when you could get up facing the consequences like Carolyn’s grandchildren. There were other factors, but that moment gives her a refreshing clarity free of doubts and seconding guessing. Maybe Eve was reaching the metaphorical event horizon that Oskana was talking about, the point where observation cannot influence the outcome. 

***

There is only so much energy the decision can take while Eve returns to work. 

Of course, she has been easing into work for weeks. Still, Eve knows more than anybody that Carolyn Martens isn't going to indulge anyone, even somebody who is dating her stepdaughter. Eve's status with Oksana is possibly a motivating factor in how hard the other woman fights for Eve to return to full strength. The legal profession isn't that different from flying in the fact that time is money and Carolyn doesn't have an endless supply to waste on an associate who isn't performing. Eve wants to make a few things clear on the orientation day even though she is pushing boundaries.

"Elena and Jess are handling the negotiations and the fallout without my supervision. The new team is picking up the ropes and are bringing impressive numbers. My convalescence has got me thinking about where I could be most useful here. I have a proposal for you." Eve says, hating that she doesn't sound in command. 

"Considering you spend most of your recovery time with the maverick that is my stepdaughter, the concept is far from reassuring. What do you propose, Eve?" Carolyn looks weary but also intrigued as she takes off her glasses. 

"I want to advocate for the most vulnerable in our negotiations, those who need representation." 

***

"Where would you factor into any decision that I make? Why are you pushing this issue?"

Eve takes her customary position in the comfortable chair so that she can lean her leg against a footstool. She looks a little ridiculous in the middle of a rock-climbing space but it’s an easy way to talk to after hours. Oksana tends to enjoy talking Eve through the particulars of her various climbs and the challenges they present, naturally, her lover takes every opportunity to defy gravity and make the exercise more difficult for herself. If she weren't part-owner, Oksana would surely be on some no-fly list for pulling these stunts. 

However, she is scrupulously safe in terms of equipment and chalks. Eve is content to watch her burn off this energy before they sit down for a real conversation or date night. The mats are soft and spongy; Eve feels confident to practice her walking and weight bearing. Oksana is a judgemental arsehole about the whole process, but the quips are at a manageable degree. At least Oksana resists the urge to pity and wince in sympathy. She has a unique view of pain and suffering. 

"You should let me take over your rehab programme. Those doctors are being far too cautious and allowing you to give in to the pain, like an advertisement for calcium supplements in middle age or something. Your nerve pain will only get worse without the motivation to move and stretch." Oksana calls down, neatly avoiding the question. 

"Will you take your inspiration from the 1970s Soviet regime, and have me doing rehabs and 23 hours a day? The accent almost works, but I think your 'exercises' would have different goals than dominating the competition, hmmm?" Eve quips back as she moves her ankle to relieve the pressure. 

"You can't neglect getting better for the sake of your existential identity crisis of the day. Time is muscle, especially when it comes to mobility patterns. There is a reason pilots keep up such insane workout requirements and end up in romance novels." Oksana insists as she works her way down to the ground. 

"You'd be pleased to know that I have come to a decision. I don't know if your pep talk about wasting money 'on the ground' did the trick, but I'll be letting the embryos go and not pursuing having a baby of my own. They'll stay on a Donation Register for a while, but my direct connection will end in a similar that all my other joint ventures with Niko Polastri. It's a way to let go of the legacy or so says the counsellor who specialises in such topics." Eve says with a tentative smile. 

"What's the other news? You could say that over the phone. Walking on that leg after 8pm and the latest round pain killer where off makes you wince and scowl." Oksana insists while waving her hands impatiently. 

"I am going to work with Carolyn to redefine my role. There are plenty of families and children who will be an in the firing line for new Brexit guidelines and laws. A legal advocate with a working knowledge of this chaotic system will be valuable. I'll need to do some retraining and upskilling on that latest case law but even under your training, my body will need time to recover." 

"Why are you smiling like Carolyn when she manages to outdrink Konstantin’s Cold War drinking buddies with the hard vodka?" Oksana questions suspiciously. 

"I probably have a similar level of mind-altering substances in my body right now; the pain is at a manageable -2 or -3." Eve says whimsically. 

"Unlikely with the strength of alcohol this country allows people like my father to import on the promise of good behaviour." 

Eve sits up, trying to mimic her best courtroom negotiation pose. The move doesn't have quite the same impact with her brace, cane and restricted movements but the technique always gave her a slight psychological edge. She feels relatively confidant in answer to the question, but it would be naive to claim that Oksana is in any way predictable. You cannot enjoy the wildness of the woman one minute and want to control her the next. Her pretty words about relationships and obsession and not a guarantee nor would Eve want such a claim for somebody so young. 

"How would you feel about coming with me for a mini-tour of major European cities and hotspots for border controversy? It will mean losing some flying time, but there is remote work you can do for Vasilev Aviation. " Eve barely resists the urge to wring her hands nervously. 

"On one condition." Oksana says with a laughing smile as she leans down so that she is eye level with Eve.

Eve swallows hard and tries not to get distracted by the Oksana proximity and the power she is displaying over the situation. Her long hair is in messy braid and Eve resists the urge to reach out and ride the loose strands. The lawyer feels a surge of envy at how easily the other woman is moving even after such vigorous exercise. 

"I am in charge of the budget and activities for the day—no more of this 50 quid limit. I've passed whatever arbitrary age gap relationship test you stole from Elle magazine." Oksana emphasis her point with a long, lingering kiss. 


	11. Family Dynamics

_"There is no such thing as a "broken family." Family is family, and is not determined by marriage certificates, divorce papers, and adoption documents. Families are made in the heart. The only time family becomes null is when those ties in the heart are cut. If you cut those ties, those people are not your family. If you make those ties, those people are your family. And if you hate those ties, those people will still be your family because whatever you hate will always be with you." _

  1. _ JoyBell C Author and Poet._

"You have more power than may be immediately apparent, Eve."

Eve is expecting a conversation with Carolyn at some stage. Her request to transfer to a different branch of Marten Legal Services makes its way through Human Resources without much protest. Still, the older lawyer was grooming her to be the heir apparent to her specific caseload and specialisation. She doesn't like to lose assets without at least understanding the decision. The only surprising aspect of the situation is that she waits a week to bring up the topic. 

"Carolyn, we've been over this, there is no need to negotiate. I don't need a wage increase nor will I take a retainer to be on call for the old team. They can handle everything perfectly well." Eve explains patiently without turning to face her visitor.

"If I didn't have most of your documents on file, it would be hard to believe you spent your formative years in America. Practitioners of the law there do _not _turn down such lucrative terms. However, that decision is not what I am referring to, Eve." Carolyn makes the sweeping generalisation without remorse and absolute confidence. 

They are standing together on the grounds of a charity air show that Konstantin is sponsoring and somewhat reluctantly volunteering her time for, with minimal complaining. As far as Eve can work out, her main complaint is that the basic plans in Vasiliev Aviation fleet are not experimental with all the attendant power and agility. The series of tricks, rolls and stunts were hard enough to get insurance for without letting Oksana do any wing-walking or gymnastics. 

"You should try getting a sample size of divorcees recovering from major injuries; the results might be different." Eve comments drily. 

The fact Eve is semi-officially dating her stepdaughter complicates the premise of the debrief but not the result. Eve will not be leaving her current job for four weeks, plenty of time to train up her replacement. Even Carolyn can't complain about the thoroughness of her handover documents and training material. Rehabilitation and long rest periods give Eve plenty of time to outline the nuances of the role that do not translate into the bland job description. 

"It may be tempting to view Oksana as the person with the power in your relationship, especially now with the rescuer/saver aspect but it's not true for reasons you may not be aware of, that may or may not influence your plans." Carolyn keeps her voice low and without inflection. 

"Is this a roundabout way of saying you don't approve of us exploring this relationship beyond the territorial borders of Great Britain?" 

"It's my way of telling you that my stepdaughter's reputation for breaking hearts and ruining minds is an accurate one in more than one country. However, few people realise that her companions were not the only ones to suffer. There are a few women in Oksana's life that took great delight in fanning the flames and encouraging self-destruction, Ana in particular."

"You have access to most of my life history since Law School, Carolyn. You, more than anyone else, should know that chaos is not something that I crave to create or nurture. Oksana has not mentioned Ana in any great detail, do we resemble each other to a worrying degree?"

"Not in the slightest. However, my original point is still valid; please be careful with Oksana's emotions and intensity where others were not.” 

***

"Nice job, Flygirl. You made the 'boring plane' fly pretty well. The spectators seem to enjoy it well enough." 

Eve smiles as she watches Oksana carefully run through each of the post-flight jobs on her list. Most of the people have left for the day, except for the organising crew, pilots, volunteers and Carolyn and Konstantin. Eve still finds it strange that she is the personal rather than the professional side of the equation and she is hanging round to take Oksana to dinner (breaking their 50 quid rule). She is quietly pleased that her injuries held up for most of the day and that cane is only necessary as that to make it over the uneven ground. 

"It went fairly well—this old hunk of metal held together pretty well and didn't protest too much. Konstantin never lets us push things to fun extremes at this publicity events. Still, air miles are all the same when it comes to basic recertification." Oksana shrugs as she walks over to join Eve. 

"Are you feeling tired?" Eve asks as they head out of the hanger. 

"Please, I could do twice that workload on my second day of flight school before a week-long bender." Oksana says dismissively, linking her arm with Eve absently taking some of her weight. 

"I'm pleased to hear such things, Sana. Then you won't mind joining your family for dinner, though we won't be revisiting your hedonistic youth. Good job today." Konstantin calls out from the large hanger entrance. 

"Believe me when I say, celebrating with Eve is far higher on my list of priorities than whatever nostalgia trip about 'your little pilot,' Konstantin. She doesn't cry with basic limb movement, vertical or horizontal, that's a big improvement." Oksana says bluntly 

"I am sure such plans can wait a few hours. Kenny is coming in after work. You two have been avoiding each other too successfully of late.” 

Oksana glowers, and the conflict is clear. Part of her wants to preen like a peacock at his praise. While equally resenting the disruption to their plans. Thankfully she avoids the obvious retort that catching up with her stepbrother is a reason to avoid going to dinner rather than a selling point. Oksana is canny enough to realise when arguing with her father is losing battle, especially when he wants to create family time. Some things are not negotiable and more importantly, may impact any spending budgeting that the family patriarch approves. Eve follows along but can't resist glaring at her boss. 

***

"What have I told you about talking freely to Stepmother Dearest? it always leads to trouble. In this case, my plans to get you naked." 

"Quit sulking, Oksana. This turn of events isn't my fault, even if you discount the fact I cannot avoid the woman who happens to be my boss. Besides, your family wanting to see you before you head off with me to parts unknown is fairly reasonably." Eve argues without looking away from the road. 

Driving is still something a chore, but Eve can make short distances. They are driving to a restaurant that is a favourite with the Vasiliev family. Eve has been there before for Carolyn's last birthday, but the circumstances were very different. The food is good and not overly pretentious. This evening won't be a relaxing time together Eve has come to enjoy, but at least she is feeling rested enough to make a decent appearance with two of the most important people in Oksana's life. 

"You are normally terrible at doing the butch ‘I am stoic and feel no pain’ thing. Why on the one day when we could use your ridiculous gravity fail, did you have to spring along like a baby antelope? The cane is a golden opportunity for a graceful exit." Oksana lectures in a voice that resembles Carolyn. 

"Because I don't want to use my slowly recovering body as a prop for emotional manipulation and I like spending time with your stepbrother on occasion?" Eve offers as she turns the corner. 

"We'll both those responses show deep flaws in your thinking that I will need to correct on our trip between your efforts to save the wretched souls of the wider European Union. Minimal level of quality exposure to these people is the name of the game." Oksana repeats earnestly. 

Eve isn't entirely sure how serious Oksana is being with her complaints about seeing her family and getting a free meal. Somewhere between 50-pound date number 3 & 4, she starts to find their constant banter as something of stress relief. Wit and comebacks were always central to their dynamic, but it becomes a useful strategy as we learn the limits. Most people struggle to get past the shock value, but Oksana possesses considerable charm and insight if you understand the rules of engagement. The banter is a good and more or less socially acceptable way to reduce the residual tension. 

***

"Mum, you like this girlfriend, she is practically your apprentice, why are we staging intervention number 99 for Oksana. I had plans tonight, and they did not involve convincing her to see the error of her ways." 

Eve blinks in surprise at the statement from Kenny. She always had a soft spot for Carolyn's son because she suspects very few other people do in his life. Oksana was unnecessarily cruel about it, but she wasn't wrong with her quips about recessive genes. Kenny is as different from his ambitious family as it is possible to be and still share blood. Kenny's sister is an estranged mystery, and these two children are the ones who 'benefit' the most from the Vasiliev-Martens Parenting Method. 

"Kenneth, our family dynamic has not dissolved to the point that you cannot reliably tell the difference between a full-scale intervention and a dinner for your sister who is leaving the country soon. We haven't seen the two of you together in months." Carolyn interjects with her sternest mother tone. 

"Er, technically, I leave the country every month. I'll take the free food, though." Oksana points out while gesturing to the selection of entrees. 

"Don't be deliberately obtuse; taking on the virtual assignments is entirely different than doing test flights where you are gone for a few days or weeks." Konstantin chides his daughter with a severe look. 

"Your company owns shares in the best telecommunications supply company in the world. Somehow I think you will be able to keep me up to date with Kenny's non-existent social life and the expanding pet menagerie." Oksana argues before grabbing another piece of bread. 

"Our arrangement is rather informal. The schedule will keep me in the main centres at various legal clinics, not in off the grid locations. If one of us need to come home for _any_ reason, it won't be a problem." Eve tries to inject a level of reassurance. 

"If things get desperate you know she'll probably hijack a skywriting plane or something equally ridiculous and hide in the Swiss Alps flying off Black Dimond slopes." Kenny looks between his parental figures in exasperation. 

"Don't be insulting Kenny, those collections of melt and rubber are horrible to fly with worse manoeuvrability than the display ones today. Eve's point still stands; we are going through continental Europe, not signing up for the next Mars colony." Eve shudders at the reference to such antics. 

***

"Are you sure about this move, it seems to put a lot of pressure on a new relationship, especially with Eve still recovering?" Konstantin takes a large swallow of red wine. 

Oksana pretends to ignore the question while she inhales the last of her vegetarian lasagna. Eve would lay bets that they are going to stop on the way home and pick up snacks. For the most part, the conversation remains pleasant, and Kenny eventually warms up when Eve asks him about his latest technological investment. He freelances for both his mother and stepfather, so their paths cross occasionally. 

"You do realise that I may resemble one, but I am not _actually _a Russian bride from InternationalMatch.com, right? Besides Eve is free from both criminal convictions and vengeful relatives. Which makes her an improvement on the last three?" Oksana offers with a casual shrug. 

"We are raising legitimate concerns here. No amount of wordplay and wit is going to get around the fact that there are obstacles against you, especially with such life changes." Carolyn replies firmly, glaring at her stepdaughter. 

"At the risk of sounding like the therapist I paid far too much for, can we get to the substance of your concerns? Eve asks, trying to keep her tone respectful. 

"We don't have an itemised list of concerns, Eve. It's more of a general observation about being careful while sharing a meal. I have every faith that you will both do well in the respectful career shifts." Carolyn does her best diplomatic lawyer tactic.

"You'll be bored to tears, Sana, but it will do you some good to liaise with airfields who do not know you are the boss's daughter and a bottomless expense account. You'll earn that generous allowance and reimbursements." Konstantin predicts, pouring another shot of whisky. 

"Yes, Sir. Villanelle will report detailed logs and pretty pictures of the horizon line for that Instagram account you pretend not to have." Oksana salutes while parroting her call sign. 

Eve shakes her head and hides a grin as she watches the interplay before her. Oksana is the product of this strange environment; somehow, she is both at the centre and removed from everything. Maybe that's why their relationship is working so far because they both challenge the norms in their respective family units. It is likely best to tackle one interrogation at a time. Oksana's Korean skills are passable but not great. 

***

"That was a clumsy ambush by your standards. The first years are better when trying to pretend they haven't spent the night in the law library." 

Eve glares at Carolyn in the bathroom mirror as they both work to apply makeup and refresh their look. Neither of them is entirely sure how to handle this meshing of their professional and personal lives. Eve doesn't appreciate the attempt at doing both simultaneously. At least that is the fairly universal excuse for time alloted to talk privately away from the others. At least this restaurant has facilities with wide spaces and relatively few spectators to the conversation. Carolyn doesn't look remotely surprised but carefully puts away her eyeliner before giving Eve her full attention. 

"You are looking for nefarious intent when none exists, Eve. I happen to care about both people in this relationship dynamic, and Konstantin is nervous about Oksana working remotely. Dinner seems like the best way to break the ice. We've barely seen her since your accident." Carolyn explains sharply. 

"Is poor Kenny Switzerland in this strange equation of yours?" Eve asks as she redoes her hairpins and fringe. 

"Unfortunately, Oksana and Kenny still require a level of parental intervention to spend time together. Underneath all the name-calling and scheming those two care about each other." Carolyn waves a hand dismissively. 

"Do you make them wear matching knit sweaters during the holiday season as a form of punishment?" Eve asks with a strange level of genuine curiosity. 

"Your Americanism is showing, Eve. Our 'modern family' does not feel the need to blend in such hideous ways. You could be there to witness our version of holiday traditions, including my estranged daughter recounting the yearly total of my failings as a parent." 

"Sounds intriguing, I'll pencil that in behind the mea culpa with the family who are still in mourning over my inability to a) stay in the country b) stay married to 'Darling Niko' and c) stay reliably straight. We'll have the makings of the next great Christmas romantic comedy." Eve sighs and leans against the bench. 

"My point remains the same, Eve. You and Oksana need to be careful with each other and the potential damage that can occur both personally or professionally. Together you can be a four-alarm firm, even more so than that mobster's daughter, Georgina." Carolyn replies. 

"Are you going to measure our success by the lack of body count or psychological scars? There doesn't seem to be a yardstick for this interrogation?" There is a much more serious note to Eve's query. 

"Unfortunately only you can truly make such determinations, parents who meddle too deeply risk creating or strengthening the Romeo and Juliet school of poor judgement. Both my daughter and stepdaughter will attest to that fact."

"While at least that copout comes with excellent food and the option for dessert." 

***

"Try not to destroy half of Europe when this all falls apart around you. The last two were bad enough and they were narrow escapes from real consequences." 

The step-siblings are left along while Konstantin takes a business call and Carolyn refreshes her makeup. While this scenario is a familiar one from their childhood, neither are particularly good and filling in the silence. They are opposite in every conceivable way, and each resents the role their respective parents take in other's life. Kenny is particularly conscious of that fact Oksana fascinates and challenges his mother. At the same time, he has more pedestrian concerns like social anxiety and no major life ambitions to speak of at the dinner table. 

"Are you still bitter about that time the girl you had a crush on asked me out? Hate to break it to you, but Annabelle is 100% on one side of the old continuum. There was no hope for you even if you could get the guts to string a sentence together." Oksana offers a look of completely false sympathy. 

"I resent how 'Project Oksana' takes up way too much of everybody's time, even when you are theoretically a functional adult with adult responsibilities. The world stops when you light a fire to watch everything burn." Kenny snaps back before taking a long swallow of wine. 

"My thing with Eve isn't going to end up like a spectator sport or with restraining orders. You'll have 'Mummy' and 'Daddy' all to yourself for months. Eve has a whole itinerary of extremely boring adult things, complete with a spreadsheet or two." Oksana puts special emphasis on the English terms of endearment. 

"I don't find that particularly comforting considering how Eve has no idea just how destructive you can be; she seems lovely, just like the last 10." Kenny's voice is thick with a mixture of amusement and resignation. 

"I'll prove you wrong, and I keep offering to teach you game."

"How are the game of a pasty computer geek and a Russian lesbian hotshot pilot ever going to look the same, Oksana?" 

"There are ways."

***

"That wasn't so bad if we discount the threats."

Eve is right in her prediction that Oksana needs a supplementary snack supply. They end up picking up a dessert selection from the restaurant to take home. Oksana is driving while Eve leans back in the passenger seat and rests her leg, which is now making its presence felt. Thankfully, both Konstantin and Carolyn have early meetings, so they don't prolong the torture too much. Eve is willing to take the meeting at face value and believe they were two parents who were genuinely concerned about a new relationship. Carolyn has been more supportive or at least neutral than many bosses. 

"At least they didn't make us stay for family portraits and off-key singing about the homeland. I've been through far worst evenings with those two and their sentimental keepsakes. It’s a form of selective amnesia I say, in half of these moments Kenny and I were trying to kill each other, literally and figuratively at times." Oksana agrees, before reaching over to grab a treat from the bag. 

"Carolyn did come close to quoting a movie cliche at me today, maybe that counts?" Eve muses out loud, feeling herself start to drift to sleep. 

"I keep telling you, Eve. Minimum viable exposure is the way to go, what did she have to say?" Oksana sounds bored with the topic. 

"With great power, comes great responsibility or something like that. She warned me that there were women in your life that didn't bring out the better angels of your nature and that I should avoid making the same mistakes." Eve explains 

"Ana again? Anybody would think she was a great Mata Hari rather than a teacher who crossed the line. In more troublesome ways than the fun ones teenage girls are obsessed with writing about, I was young and stupid, without the emotional regulation that flying gave me. There is no need to hold everything to that benchmark." 

"Will you tell me about it someday and warn me if you are starting to feel that way with me or us?" Eve asks, keeping her voice soft. 

"Please, Eve; you practically made me write a legal argument about all the factors that would constitute a date. The situations couldn't be more different, for one thing, we do _a lot _more talking. I even know how your liver and kidneys function. Anna wouldn't let me know the street they lived on, for a good reason in the end, but still." Oksana shrugs in a way that is not quite casual. 

"Such a gross abuse of power without even guts to be invested in the situation." Eve shakes her head and scowls. 

"Don't get all overworked and legal about the past. Konstantin paid good money to settle things. Besides talking to you is far more entertaining than pinning from a far." Oksana smiles with genuine enthusiasm. 

"That's good to know." 


	12. Europe in Motion I

_Why do you go away? So that you can come back. So that you can see the place you came from with new eyes and extra colors. And the people there see you differently, too. Coming back to where you started is not the same as never leaving – Terry Pratchett_

Eve will admit to stressing about the logistics of having a genuine relationship with her boss's daughter. 

While the ambush dinner was irritating, Konstantin did raise valid points. There are limits to continental Europe's famous liberalism and acceptance. A romantic connection between people that are so outwardly different is going to raise speculation. For all of their months of flirtation and gradual move towards a relationship, this working trip will be a whole new set of circumstances to overcome and potentially fail. Eve is a senior lawyer and she doesn't make impulsive decisions easily or lightly, the sole exceptions being agreeing to date Oksana Astankova and allowing this relationship to progress beyond a fling.

A large part of Eve is expecting to lose Oksana to the sights and sounds of Berlin or something. The younger woman pulls off jaded weariness better than anybody Eve has ever known, but the temptations abound. Maybe Carolyn was right that there are some stress tests that new relationships will not pass. The one redeeming feature of such a notion is that there will be plenty of places to drown her sorrows and explore the later in life lesbian desires that her girlfriend hinting she is repressing. 

The biggest factor that could help or hinder their relationship is that for the first time, they will be alone, not in the literal sense but as an identity. During the formative parts of this dynamic Eve has always been Carolyn's protegee and Oksana's is her stepdaughter. Their previous lives play into everything that happens, from dates at the vegan cafe to an occasional run-in with jealous exes. During this trip, they will only be two women in an age-gap relationship with no back history for people to speculate about or judge. It will be the first time Eve is travelling is any partner aside from Nico. 

_"_We are not adopting a hoard of tow-haired children, no matter how wretched their stories or cute their lisps. We will have no living baggage of any kind. Unless you would like to pick out a pet from the girls in districts..." Oksana offers the last part in a suggestive drone as she enters the room. 

"Oksana..." Eve warns, gearing up for a lecture.

"We would select her carefully of course, all ethically with consent, wellness checks and background, settling that little lawyer purest heart of yours." Oksana holds up her hands defensively. 

“There are absolutely _no _scenarios that would make that a possibility, you haven’t succeeded in your corruption on my moral compass yet, Sana.”

“Meh, there is still time. Berlin is too easy and cliched anyway.”

***

There is extreme boredom in Paris. 

Eve has no direct points of comparison but if any kind of travel can drain The City of Lights of its mystic and romanticism, it’s possibility human rights law. Lawyers, in general, have a reputation for grand parties and expensive alcohol. However, when you are meeting with people to discuss the economic state of vulnerable people under Brexit things sober up pretty fast. There are middle of the road conference rooms in industrial areas with people that are still hopeful yet beaten down by the system. Tourists often forget that Paris is a working city like any other. 

"I'll be in meetings for most of the day, but we can have dinner later tonight, and you can show me your purchases for the day, remember there are reasonable limits to our baggage limits. We are going to multiple cities with pretty retail opportunities." Eve warns as she gets ready for the morning. 

"Yes Dear, would you like me to have a meal ready at the door, with pearls and perfume?" Oksana asks sardonically as she lounges on the bed. 

"I was a horrible wife; there is no way I am going to expect somebody else to take the job.”

“So are you going to make your intellectual home in France and dispense legal wisdom with the poor wretched children?" Oksana asks flippantly as she asks reaches for a magazine. 

"I am not planning on specialising in children's law, that will far too much retraining. The purpose is to look at how the trade negotiations will affect people who are vulnerable." Eve explains again before rushing around the room. 

"Whatever you decide, just tell me how many air miles I need to fudge on the logbook when I come to see you. Anywhere in Europe works, outside of Motherland and Poland." Oksana defers with a wave of her hand. 

"To make such a decision, I need to have many more boring meetings and recertify my skills in different areas. Think of this trip as a starting point rather than the decider."

"I could certify your skills in many areas if you like...none Carolyn would approve of though. For all I know or care you got your law degree from a cereal box." Oksana 

"My student loan would beg to differ. Now go and be judgemental about French people elsewhere, I do need to get ready for these meetings without distraction." Eve makes a vague shooing gesture. 

Oksana is laughing as she flounces out of the room wearing an outfit that costs more than Eve’s entire business wardrobe. It makes her smile to know that against the odds they are working out the differences. Conversing with Oksana is fun, challenging and erratic. In all their time together there isn’t one hint of wanting Eve to change or be better.

***

There are excitement and laughter in Rome. 

Italy is beautiful this time of year. Eve doesn't necessarily enjoy skipping between countries to talk about such heavy topics. Her body is healing at an impressive rate. However, the mixture of sitting still and getting on and off planes and trains is challenging. She tries to take small chunks of time to appreciate the city and doing one or two activities with Oksana. It's almost like training wheels for their bigger travel plans and Eve's plans to take her new role. 

Her bad legs start to throb towards the end of the day. They are spending an average of three days in each country, and it is barely enough to get an orientation meeting. Oksana seems to have a unique rating system for judging success and enjoyment. Of course a fighter pilot has high octane ideas of fun. They are separate for most of the day, but Oksana seems cheerful when they connect. 

"So are you going to make your intellectual home in Italy and dispense legal wisdom with the poor wretched children and lost causes?" Oksana asks her customary question as they meet for dinner. 

"I am not about looking at a single country. For the most part, my base will still be England, maybe even the same offices, I'll rotate with the team occasionally.” 

"Isn't the whole point of this mission for you to have your mid-life crisis and discover yourself through food and the lives of other people? With ceremonies and crying? My nutjob of a stepsister insists on reading those biographies like a religion." Oksana asks in a bored tone. 

"Geraldine isn't that bad; your family isn't the easiest to be part of; she struggles to function against the duo that are your parental figures. Boarding school did not help." Eve defends the older Swanton. 

"She is barely functional as a human being without a handful of pills as validation. It's a shame she is painfully straight. She'd find plenty of women willing to workshop feelings in bed, it would do her a world of good. The original point still stands, major life change..." Oksana prompts. 

"One could argue that accepting the attentions of a much younger woman with a wild reputation, aristocratic exes and three personal planes does that job nicely. There are plenty of books on _those _topics too." Eve points out, dropping an affectionate kiss on pouting lips. 

Oksana takes them on a tour of all the best gelato places in the city that are open later. They end up sampling flavours at 1 am and splitting a second helping of the favourites at around 3am. Fortunately, Oksana doesn't suggest they try any harder drugs or substances. For all her rule-breaking sobriety seems to be a key milestone. Perhaps there is more information in the misspent youth. 

"Did Niko take you on sugar tours under star light?" Oksana asks randomly. 

"We came here as poor students on a shoestring and a backpack, so no. This time is by far my most memorable trip to Italy.” 

***

There is burning desire in Berlin.

Oksana has very strong feelings about the city and its reputation as the centre of freedom and desire. Eve is going from the conference room to meeting space, so the extent of her artistic engagement is seeing the Berlin Wall art. Eve always feels a profound connection to some of the tributes and sculptures scattered throughout the city. There are so many historical reference points and inspirations for her new role as an advocate. 

"Do you like Berlin? You don't seem to hate too much at the moment?" Eve asks as they walk over the cobblestones in the older streets. 

"I am impressed with the budget you are allowing us for this visit." Oksana says easily. 

Oksana gives a running commentary of her time going on the long walks and reconnecting with old friends and friends from flight school. Konstantin wants her to represent the family with several suppliers and engineers. Surprisingly, Oksana doesn't try and duck out of the commitment. One table in their room is full of scattered drawings, schematics and fuel calculations, in mixtures of English and Russian. 

They have breakfast in the morning and share traditional German staples. Eve doesn't speak German, but Oksana has a working knowledge of the language. She can ask for the basics and flirt with friendly waitresses. On a basic level Eve can understand how these people circle Oksana like a magnet or smaller planets. Her girlfriend is like the perfect mimic, giving them exactly what they want to hear. 

Eve is rapidly learning you do not need to understand the words to catch the intent, especially when Oksana comes to embody the stereotype of a charming aviator. It doesn't take long for people to become besotted with the idea of somebody who flies test planes. The conversations happen most mealtimes. For the most, jealousy is a useless emotion, this technique comes as naturally to Oksana as breaking. Seeing the same waitress seven meals in a row goes beyond the likelihood of statistical reason—something possessive flares in Eve, more so than any time in her adult life. 

"We are going back to the hotel room." Eve declares firmly, a hard edge to her voice. 

"Aren't you going to discuss legal frameworks in refugee camps or something to fatten Carolyn's feel-good quota for the firm?" Oksana sounds genuinely confused. 

Eve answers the question by leaning over and giving her a long, deep kiss that leaves no doubt of her intentions or the nature of their relationship. She bites hard against Oksana's lip for extra emphasis even though the taller woman is following her willingly. 

They don't make it to the room before Eve is shoving her partner into a relatively secluded corner in the sweeping grand room, behind a large vase and some strangely decorative plants. The protection is minimal, but that doesn't stop Eve from attacking the long slope of her pale neck and pushing her full weight against Oksana who leans further into the wall. Oksana is never one to pass up an opportunity and is an expert on navigating women's clothing. Her hands rake up Eve's back, still being mindful of the scars. 

"Not that I mind, but I didn't peg you for having a thing for exhibitionism." Oksana gaps in her ear. 

"You are the one that keeps obsessing about my latent lesbian desires, now hush." Eve commands between movements and motions. 

Eve is too much of a pragmatist to complete the act in semi-public, the legal profession is a small one, and she doesn't need more of a reputation. However, it is a near thing. Their closest neighbours in the hotel are likely in no doubt about their sex life. Oksana's skin is so pale in carries marks easily, and she doesn't seem to be in any hurry to cover them up. 

"If you are taking votes, I am in favour of Berlin if this is the affect it has on you, Eve." Oksana comments almost proudly, tracing the bruise rising on her collarbone. 

  
“Good to know but pretty sure that was more about the company than the geography.” Eve points out with an impish grin.

“For the record, Lawyer Lady. The waitress who you were looking ready to murder is straighter than straight. She is going to intern with the offices here and was chatting about mutual friends. I did enjoy your little display of territory though, feel free to repeat at will..” Oksana offers in the same tone.

“I’ll keep that in mind. There is a little more time before that next late conference call... to repeat the experiment” Eve invites with a blatant stare.

***

There is profound sharing in Stockholm. 

It's not the city but the aspect that they are coming together towards the end of the first adventure. Stockholm is the place where Eve is doing the least amount of work. She is meeting with part of the legal advocacy team that Carolyn has links with; they are having a friendly lunch and a tour of the facility. Eve likes the opportunity to take long walks in the flat paths and wide concrete. There are so many different pathways leading from the central regions of Stockholm. 

"I should take you sailing." Oksana declares while eating her second ice cream. 

"Are you arrogant enough to think that you can be lord of two elemental domains, Fly Girl?

Eve gives her companion a fairly dubious look. Her athletic ability is improving with the weeks of rock climbing; the chances of her being able to keep up with Oksana's notions of sailing is still low. For the most part, all of their activities thus far are confined to solid ground, which is a miracle. 

Oksana may badger one of her buddies at the local airbase to let her go up. There have been no reports of any major diplomatic incidents and Eve's hasn't needed to bail anyone out of Swedish custody yet, so that's a win in her book. 

"Of course, but the more salient point is that this country is one big network of islands, surely at least one or two are worth a visit? Sven gave me a map of the places with real food that isn't pickled herring, which will do in a pinch, but way too briny." Oksana explains, waving her hands in between bites. 

"Is there anything biodegradable that you wouldn't eat in a pinch?" Eve asks with genuine curiosity. 

"Anything prepared by the matrons of Russian orphanages between roughly 1980s to 2000s. They took inspiration from Chairman Mao and thought he was too overly generous with the portion sizes and flavour varity." Oksana declares, her voice uncharacteristically bleak for a second. 

Eve feels her heart clench. Oksana rarely talks about her time in the care of the state. Her adoption was relatively early with Konstantin’s first wife. Carolyn confides that her file (patchy as it is) makes for grim reading and they spent a small fortune on therapists and clinicians to connect with Oksana as a child and young adult. 

_"She is both my most troublesome and worthwhile investment, or at least the ultimate example of the Justification of Effort Fallacy. At least she knows enough of the world to scorn it the way she does." Carolyn observes one day. _

"Don't give me the Tragic Orphan Look; your eyes are doing that weird melty thing that everybody gets when they hear the story. Konstantin sold his first business because the guys' wife felt sorry for the orphan, the same look." Oksana jabs her finger in Eve's face accusingly. 

"There is no look, Oksana I swear, it surprises me when you talk about your past at all, much less Russia." Eve chimes in gently, battering away the pointing finger. 

"That's because its sooo boring. If you are going to take on the work for the ones displaced by capitalism, be willing to face boredom—the same story of woe with little to no means to do anything about it. It will be like being in a support group for eight hours a day. At least the frustration sex should be north of great." Oksana predicts with a sardonic grin.

"Change is still possible, and I want to contribute the skills that I have."

"Yes, Yes heal families because you can't have one of your own, all very sad and Freudian." Oksana attempts a truly dreadful Austrian accent. 

"Instead of breaking down my psyche, can you find a decent boat, without restoring to stealing or bribery. I have plenty of briefs to read tonight so have fun with me while you can." Eve advises. 

"I always do."

***

"You are mine for the night."

Eve slants her gaze curiously at both the possessive note in her girlfriend's voice and the fact she is fully dressed. Normally, when Oksana starts talking in such terms, clothing is optional. Tonight seems quite the opposite. Eve obligingly picks up the outfit that Oksana puts on the bed. The suit is deceptively simple, but there is a richness to the colour and delicate, complementary patterning on the shirt. There is no obvious let up in Oksana's obsession with accessories. The earrings and hair clips glimmer faintly in the light. 

Everything is still several sizes too big after her accidental weight loss, but Oksana is an expert when it comes to style. It will take a few weeks (of extravagant hotel food) for her frame to look less gaunt. Of all the possible people Eve could end up with, somebody who adores fashion was not high on the list. There are entire colour spectrums that Oksana insist work perfectly with her shape and hair. Eve cannot honestly say that the 40+ years she went without knowing these things were a hardship. Still, there is a strange, heady mixture of ego and preening that is oddly appealing after the gruelling rehab. Truthfully, she has enjoyed putting on a show for Oksana since the beginning. 

"You did promise to let me buy you a few things from the real places in Europe. The end of your first 'Save the Children' whistle-stop tour is the right time to start. Spain is a little boring, but it is a good place as any for what I have in mind." 

"Your taste ranges from dessert with gold leaf chocolate to cheap Hello Kitty merch from street vendors. You are going to need to narrow the field down for me a bit." Eve asserts as she fiddles with the earing to get it to sit right. 

"Ah Eve, you need such an education if a gold leaf is what you consider an example of luxury. Is it not customary for couples to commemorate trips together? Step Mother Dearest has cabinets full of useless sentimental crap. Konstantin has no taste, except when it comes to selecting engines." Oksana stage whispers the last part. 

"We are not getting tattoos or any other form of body modification. I am not that desperate to reclaim youth or embrace relationship cliches." Eve warns in her sternest voice. 

"Please, I have somebody for that, and he would break up with me if I dared part with a single euro with anybody but him, especially if I brought somebody as tempting as you for his artistic eye." Oksana dismisses as she kisses Eve's bare shoulder. 

"Is there an entire legion of woman with stylistic 'O's on their skin through Europe then?" Eve challenges with a raised eyebrow. 

"Don't be crass; the fleeting nature of those encounters was half the fun. At least 80% of them won't even remember that my name is Oksana, much less want a permanent reminder of a fleeting encounter. Georgina is an exception to the rule, I swear." Oksana replies with uncharacteristic seriousness. 

"One day you will explain to me while I am the exception to your long line of seduction rules and merit such marvels as willingly spending time with Carolyn. " Eve replies in an equal tune. 

"If you go on a lecture our ages, your looks or the future again, I will saddle you with 2 kilos of gummy bears in our likeness. I know a guy who does custom confectionary, and he owes me a massive favour." Oksana threatens. 

"I am yours to command for the night, Fly Girl." 


	13. Date Night in Spain (Ode to Proximity)

"_Baby, let your light shine on me_

_When I'm lost on the road_

_You know you could set me free_

_You could ease my load_

_Days get so dark_

_That I can't hardly see_

_I've been gone so long._

_It seems like home to me_" - Two Gallants _Seems Like Home to Me. _

Eve is my balance point. 

"Do we need to go over the rules again?" Eve asks as she leans in and takes my hand. 

"Nothing permanent or permanently public on the internet." I repeat while rolling my eyes for effect. 

"I feel like giving you such leeway and freedom, but weeks of following me across Europe to boring meetings deserves some reward." Eve laughs as she walks carefully on the cobblestones, her legs are getting stronger.

"It’s such hardship is facing a pampering expert in such things and having a night of fun, never mind said expert is your stunningly attractively girlfriend." I put in an almost genuine way. 

"It is something of hardship when I spend half my working life obsessing over the smallest details of diplomacy and trade. Surprises generally mean wars have broken out or sessions are in gridlock. Not to mention that your traps can range from homicide-curious exes to a complete disregard for gravity." Eve replies, her voice serious for a moment. 

Being a part of the traditional couple has nothing to recommend it as a proposition. Plenty of women try over the years; thankfully, most are not as extreme as the wannabe mobster's daughter. Still, walking with Eve and holding her hand feels strangely satisfying as if I reach the best part of the movie without the boring bits. The streets of Spain are as good as any for this date night. 

"We need to get you away from Carolyn, you a need a detox from her rigid mentality and horizons. Even the wretched orphans have more appeal." I complain automatically. 

Stepmother Carolyn wasted a small fortune in mental health for me over the years, the best in London and Europe struggle to see as more than the product of the 'neglectful' Russian system. I used the time to manipulate people and parrot 'normal emotions better' to avoid psychiatric stays as a teen. 

My plan didn't always work, and Konstantin’s money came in handy for more than a few emergencies. Flight school was a suggestion of one of the last experts, seeing my natural aptitude for theoretical and temperament training. I did the first to get access to the second and the shiny planes with big engines. Eve and our relationship reflect a balancing point. 

There is one talking point that sticks with me from therapist number 4 or 5. She said that someone with my background was always seeking the balance between extreme impulses—the quest to defy Mother Russia and the need to survive. Causing endless trouble for Konstantin Vasiliev and recognising that he has the power to give me a good future. The natural appeal of extreme flying but coveting a perfect safety record. The woman was boring and painfully ethical, but her words did have a certain amount of logic. 

***

The way Eve looks at me is the first thing that attracts me to her. 

I tend to provoke reactions in people and typically strong ones. The people in Martens Legal Services avoid interacting with me at any cost; I like to think of the move as the Kenny Scale. My stepbrother's feelings about me tend to range from terrified to apathetic. Carolyn's underlings tend to look at me the same way. There was something about how Eve didn't back down from my most provocative statements that made me want to learn more. 

My former friends on social media take great delight in saying that Eve is light years from my usual type. While they are right, in the strictest sense of the term, it's an idiotic comparison as well. I was never going to get the same satisfaction from Eve as I did the other women that tempt me. She was never a consideration for a fling; it was all about the game. The game that was learning about a bright and shiny object that caught my attention. 

"You are taking me to a Spanish dance hall, Where 99% of the couples are straight, and the music is from an era before you were born." Eve is openly laughing now. 

"Spain has a reputation for more than food, architecture and bulls. There are plenty of different places to dance that don't involve lighting or electronic beats." I reason, leading her towards the floor in question. 

"This is all part of an elaborate plan for you to get your kicks, watching how my leg moves and bathing in reflective glory over the healing rate, isn't it." Eve challenges, while following me willingly enough. 

"As if I need to bathe in anything but genuine glory, Eve. Dancing is a good way to forget everything. Also useful for pilots who are coming down from the high of flying and testing speed limits. It is something of a hobby." I confess because couple seems to share such things. 

Eve is the definition of unpredictable. Especially for somebody who chooses the most boringly predictable job on the planet and voluntarily chooses to work with my stepmother. She willingly plays my giving and takes game while seeming to enjoy finding flaws in my arguments. Simple gestures make her blush, but she will stare down the knowledge of my past without flinching. 

"Somehow, I thought my introduction to your secret world of hobbies would involve more subterfuge and code words. At least your middle-class emergent girlfriend only stands out in 3 or 4 different ways and not a baker's dozen. Let's see what my new cooperative nerves can do, shall we?" Eve doesn't sound uncertain or self-conscious.

The night might already be a success, and I haven't even got the chance to touch her and move in the same rhythm. Eve is giving me a challenging look as if she is waiting for my next argument or one-liner. Instead, I grin and lead her onto the dance floor. 

***

The way Eve laughs when we enter the next dance hall is borderline ridiculous. 

My date doesn't believe me when I say that our primary activity for the evening will be dancing at different events. Eve expects me to push her boundaries on multiple levels, but not quite like this, there is a mixture of tourists and locals in the building. The music is upbeat and rapid but not too fast for Eve's healing leg and still fragile self-esteem. Eve follows along willingly with my plan after the first dance or two. She is self-conscious about her body and the limb, but she is stronger each day. 

"It's going to be a while before I can convince you to go up on the climbing wall or in my microlight again. Dancing is the next best thing and is the furthest thing away from saving wretched orphans with poor prospects." I explain while leading her around the dance floor. 

"Your powers of persuasion over me are disturbingly strong, Oksana. I wouldn't be here otherwise." Eve is laughing as she rests her head on my shoulder. 

"If you weren’t frustratingly immune to my charms we would be more further along in our arrangement than dates with a spend limit and confessions at vegan noodle houses." I grumble

"If I weren't immune in some way you would be onto girlfriend #11 and Eve wouldn't rate a mention in your speed dial. Vegan noodles are a minor price to pay for such witty company." Eve predicts as she pulls me closer. 

Her sudden surge of possessiveness makes me smile wickedly. Eve is getting more confident about the idea of being out with a woman, me in particular. The dress she is wearing is perfect for dancing without violating any of her many rules about ‘propriety.' Naturally, I am the one with the bold and bright colours and elaborate shoes, that are not toe friendly. Eve still looks striking in the flat (leg injury approved) shoes and black dress. If I didn't spend such a long time getting her hair up in a perfect twist, I would itch to undo it. 

***

The way Eve wears her collection of perfumes is enticing. 

I have the codename Villanelle because my former classmates believe me a princess and a wealthy scion. Of course, they are right but for more reasons than my taste in perfume. I take far more pleasure in shopping for Eve now and figuring out creative ways to get around her stupid 50-pound date rule. Her appreciation for accessories is growing, and I enjoy finding new ways to treat her. 

"It's a tough call, but Number #7 is the perfume that suits you best. I am open to other possible variation,s but the mixture of spice and floral sense is perfect." As if to prove my point, I inhale sharply below her neck. 

"You are the one who is the amateur perfumer here, Sana. I am merely your willing test subject. My mother is impressed by your influence on my wardrobe choices. " Eve confesses with a laugh as we twirl in a different direction. 

"You are by far my favourite test subject." I lean in and place a gentle kiss at her neck. 

My enjoyment of luxury and pomp is a combination of both chance and practicality. If I were going to be a 'successful' daughter of Konstantin Vasiliev, he requires me to move in a certain circle, with the right clothing and manners. The wide-eyed country kid is only appealing in American movies, specifically the romantic adaptations of Anastasia Nikolaevna living into adulthood. It becomes easy to pick up the mannerisms and attitude of someone born to this life. Perfume and accessories practically signpost how much genuine wealth someone has, especially if they waste it on a daughter. 

"Why do you like scents so much?" Eve asks the question on a slight gasp. 

"I could be a simple as a kink, often the women or girls that I covet or were around the most wore perfume or the more masculine ones used the sandalwood types. There is something intimate and exciting about the point on the throat. Tracking the scent and presenting little tokens was an easy way to admire them without causing them to spiral into an identity crisis." I surmise with a shrug, kissing her neck to prove my point. 

"Did you care about people and their troubles with identity?" Eve sounds deeply skeptical. 

"Not in the slightest, but women in Konstantin's circles tend to do their relationship aghast in public ways, which can get messy and distracting without any of the fringe benefits. It was safer to be sure of my reception before making a definitive move." I explain before moving in a complicated swirl. 

"That makes sense if I switch off my brain and think like a grand seductress." Eve confirms laughing as I continue to kiss her shoulder. 

Somehow I accidentally find myself in something close to what the therapists call a 'real relationship.' Of course, the normal parameters don't apply to me; any psych test will tell an undergrad that this thing with Eve is new. Suddenly my default positions are changing, instead of distracting her with the idea of sex or a wordplay; I end up talking about the past and random events. The whole frozen embryo drama and listening to her agonise brings a reciprocal effect. If she wants to hear about the history than I am willing to share. 

***

Dancing is a selfish excuse to touch Eve. 

Of course, I genuinely want to improve her self-esteem and drag her away from the office. Eve needs to recover from her trauma and shock, but I am far from a natural healer. Mainly, I want the excuse to touch her and feel her move with my rhythm. Nobody bothers to challenging us on our age-gap or other aspects. I purposefully pick the more liberal parts of town who still keep the traditional alive. How queer-friendly an establishment is has never bothered me before but an urge to protect Eve makes me see the situation differently. 

"We are not going to recreate the moment from _Dirty Dancing _or anything similar. My age may not prevent us from doing much but a full lift is on the list without question." Eve whispers in my ear in a most enticing. 

"You keep bringing up all these references, Eve. I have no idea what they are, but it sounds enticing." I tease her as we move in an easy loop. 

"The Russian version of a clueless peasant is not a good or convincing look for you. For one thing, the country of your birth is far less isolated than it once was, for another, you have an endless supply of useless trivia on hand. The central point remains the same, no elaborate dance moves, fictional or otherwise." Eve calls my bluff with a sceptical look. 

"Fine, but if tonight proves anything to me, it’s that you are ready to go back to the basic climbing walls with Walter. Your weight transference and balance are well with acceptable ranges." I challenge mainly to see her response. 

"No wonder you have such success with your social media haram, with lines like that on display. Do other people know you compartmentalise women into biomechanical success rates." Eve asks, letting me lead her through a quick step. 

"I had to do something unique to get past your 'I'm too late in life to Sapphic desires, my ex-husband is a saint vibe' you had going on at the time. There was practically a neon sign above your head." I point out the obvious reasons with my best charming grin. 

"Keep moving Fly Girl, before I suggest that we send cute coupley shots to Carolyn. We are, in different ways, her favourite projects after all." Eve warns with playful seriousness in her tone. 

To punish my dance partner for making such a horrific suggestion, I pick up the pace of this dance. It took me a few hours of searching to find the right sort of dance halls and restaurants with floors; we could not join the cruise ship crowd. The effort was worthwhile when Eve is having such a good time and not obsessing about either work, failing reproductive system, or nerve damage. As the night progresses, we develop a rhythm that makes each dance smooth and precise. Eve doesn't comment when other couples give us odd looks or make the occasional comments. Perhaps my efforts to corrupt her into not caring so much are paying off at last. 

***

"How are you feeling? Were those last two turns too much of a challenge?" I ask as we navigate a busy street. 

I don't need to ask the question to know the answer. Eve's body gave her away when she was fighting her attraction to me, and the same tells are present now. Her back and hip are giving her trouble, and the limp she works to hide is obvious as we walk to the hotel. Eve doesn't complain or offer a word of disagreement when we reach the last destination. The pain must be at a manageable level and part of the routine that comes with getting better. She can't hide away behind an office job forever. 

"My partner in these activities has the coordination of a cross-fit trainer, of course, it was a challenge, but a good one. Was scandalising the poor waiter who wanted your number strictly necessary? He may never speak to a member of the opposite sex again." Eve scolds me with no real anger. 

"No great loss to the global gene pool." I say, trying to muster the energy to care. "Of course. it was obvious we are together as a couple. The man was looking for a quick fling with the wrong visitor." I explain without much patience. 

"Oksana, even you can acknowledge that few people are going to automatically assume we are a couple. Sadly for you, I am far too conservative stake my claim publicly. Carolyn isn't wrong when she talks about the many pressures that we will face on any given day." Eve points out in her best lawyer voice; there is even a hint of British twang in there.

"Why couldn't I have caught the attention of that tall woman in the tax division, the one with the braids." I muse mainly to provoke a reaction. 

"Because Trisha is surprisingly conservative and firmly not of the bi-curious nature and doubtless ignored your first flirtations? Eve guesses while keeping her voice even. 

"Also, she treats Kenny like he is barely functioning as an adult, which he is, but she thinks my stepbrother is wonderful, which is a definite hard limit for me." I confess with a hard shudder. 

"I'm sorry there were such slim pickings at Martens Legal Services." Eve rolls her eyes at me. 

"I am reasonably confident that there was only one woman desperately seeking sapphic enlightenment and willing to trade barbs in multiple languages. I am pretty sure you had me at 'obsessive ego maniac'?" I say with absolute honesty. 

"If you ever get tired of aviation or Konstantin runs out of experimental plans, you should try an advice column. You paint the picture of perfect psychological health." 

Eve is starting to tire from the evening activities and is learning more heavy against me. Neither of us says a word about this latest sign; we don't have the kind of relationship that workshops everything. Eve will ice her sore back before sitting down to write her reports diligently. I will try and bribe the interns at the office to do the same minimal tasks, or else we may accidentally fall into a domestic routine. There wouldn't be a therapist alive willing to take on that challenge for me. 


End file.
